Jokes / Joke du jour!

Ha!

Sorry buddy. But you're doubling up on eBay. Not allowed..

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I'm squeezing a Geordie Yoda joke out of this one...

What did Geordieyoda say when told he was in a BluRay remaster...

...EMI?

Sorry...it's early...

And there I was ready for some Cannondale porn

Apologies if this is a repost..

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Why was the snowman rummaging through a bag of carrots?

He was picking his nose.

My nearly 7 year old’s latest joke ^.

It's nearly that time of year when I get ready to read out the Xmas cracker joke, but it's really shit, so I think of a different one that might actually make people chuckle. I might borrow that one!

What is Santa’s primary language?

North Polish.

What do you do if your nose goes on strike?

Picket.

Edit. Nevermind

When David Bowie recorded Little Drummer Boy with Bing Crosby, he bought Crosby a thank-you gift.

A Pom-Pom.

but not just any Pom-Pom.

it was a proper Pom-Pom

^ ha ha haaaaaah!

Lol

hilarious

Reminds me of my nephew's one of a few months ago.

Why did the baker have brown hands?

He kneaded a poo.

classic!

My dog keeps barking at common people. I reckon they sold me a Jarvis Cocker Spaniel.

My 39 year old friend swears blind he invented that joke 🤦‍♂️

There is an absolutely heinous version of that joke for those that already know the original punchline, wins every bad taste joke contest ever

Beacuse he was Nigerian.

Indeed

./img/thatsracist.gif

Racist or not, it’s a shit version of that joke

Related to the punchline only that's
given in Sherlock Holmes

To which the barman says, 'May I push in your stool?