Jokes / Joke du jour!

By near I actually meant in

It's nature innit

A common misconception founded by men who think much too highly of themselves.

You don't hear people saying all gay men actually secretly want to have sex with women, it's perfectly accepted that they are 100% homo. So why is it so difficult to believe the same for gay women?

wrong thread

A common misconception founded by men who think much too highly of themselves.

You don't hear people saying all gay men actually secretly want to have sex with women, it's perfectly accepted that they are 100% homo. So why is it so difficult to believe the same for gay women?

lol. going to use that.

Why is it that when a women sleeps with loads of men we call her a slut,

but when a man does, we call him a homosexual?

I'm really worried about my Parrot.
He keeps saying, "I can't go on, I hate my life".

My room-mate's too selfish to notice. He's always crying.

lolz

Why is it that when a women sleeps with loads of men we call her a slut,

but when a man does, we call him a homosexual?

Brilliant!

I'm really worried about my Parrot.
He keeps saying, "I can't go on, I hate my life".

My room-mate's too selfish to notice. He's always crying.

excellent!!!

It took a lot of balls for me to go on the Channel 4 show ''Embarrassing Bodies''.

Three actually.

I Googled Gary Oldman and got some pretty disturbing images, he's really let himself go I thought. Then I realised I'd left the R out.....

mine - Wrote my bucket list today: 1) sand castle bucket 2) decorators bucket (with rolling wooden handle) 3) KFC bucket 4) sick bucket 5) mop bucket

More conceptual

A pail imitation of a joke.

"Jesus loves you."

A nice gesture in church.

A horrific thing to hear in a Mexican prison.

^ lolz!

Massive death toll when the wave hits Indonesia?.......................what? Too Tsun?

How many Mexicans does it take to change a lightbulb??

Just Juan

reminds me of......................two Spanish firemen........................................José and Hose B

Was at the swimming pool earlier and thought i'd have a cheeky wee in the deep end. The lifeguard must have seen me, he blew his wistle so hard I nearly fell in!

Hehe.
Good page so far!

I asked a prostitute if we could do something kinky, so she put a pair of jump leads up my arse, don't get me wrong, I liked it a lot , but fuck me, I couldn't believe how much she charged me.....

Som bloke ran out of my house naked. Silly man, he's never going to sell my wife double glazing dressed like that.

My wife has become very insecure in her middle age.

"I'm so jealous of you," she said. "You're still good looking and full of confidence."

"Don't be silly," I replied. "It should be me who is jealous of you."

"Really?" she asked, as her face lit up.

"Of course," I said. "You get to be married to me. I'm stuck with a fat arsed, miserable bitch."

Furious. Just been on hold with the carpet remnants warehouse for 20 minutes then got cut off.....

Equally annoyed, on the phone to the woman at the curtain place down the road, she hung up on me.