Daily Mail in cycling shocker!

jesus

And I hope his mum finds out that he writes for the Mail.

I hope his mum finds a stash of pornography under his mattress, and confronts him about it in front of all his friends.

Can we just all stop this 'I hope....' business please. The first 4 were OK but 26 pages later is no fun, there's work to be done

I hope that one of the subeditors from the Mail will discover this thread and thereby learn that I would personally pay him/her £100 in cash to insert the phrase "James Martin is a cunt" into one of James Martin's motoring articles.

What did you write Oliver?

This:

"But I don't care about any of that, and here's why. Twenty minutes into my test drive I pulled round a leafy bend, enjoying the birdsong - and spotted those damned Spider-Man cyclists. Knowing they wouldn't hear me coming, I stepped on the gas, waited until the split second before I overtook them, then gave them an almighty blast on the horn at the exact same time I passed them at speed.

"The look of sheer terror as they tottered into the hedge was the best thing I've ever seen in my rear-view mirror. I think this could be the car for me."

If this story is true, the writer deliberately harassed cyclists in writing his article. It is of course likely that this bit is simply made up, in which case he implicitly advocates harassing cyclists. If they actually occurred, his actions had the potential to cause a serious fall or collision. It is also highly irresponsible to suggest to impressionable drivers that such actions are worthwhile, as similar incidents do occur.

And the bit of the Code that I allege he breached:

1. i) Journalists must not engage in intimidation, harassment or persistent pursuit.
   
   

If he made up this story, he should be forced to publicly admit it and suffer the embarrassment. If he did not make it up, I believe that he breached clause 4. i).

Short and simple.

Well done mate

^ HAHAHAHA!

The fat Northern cunt! Oh, hang on....

^ HAHAHAHA!

The fat Northern cunt! Oh, hang on....

he is hanging on...to a deep fried something shaped like a bike saddle

Just as an aside, my ex-girlfriend would have crawled over broken glass to put love-bites on his turds. She luuuurrrrrves James Martin.

No relevance to the thread, I just thought I'd share that with you.

And Macc Lads - they rock. I have their stuff on vinyl. MUST buy a USB turntable and get the record boxes out of me mammy's loft. Long-forgotten works of genius which need to be revived, I feel.

beer beer we want more beer
get the fucking beers in
all the lads are cheering

I think you'll find you have the lines in incorrect order what you have as line 3 should be in line 2 and vice versa.

There once was a cuntflap named Martin,
a Tesla test drive he took part in.
He angered some folks
who responded with jokes,
I hope that the twat is now smarting.

22 syllables = haiku fail

i am demonstrably unsure of haiku's

yeah, I'm sorry for my Face Book one this morning.

ffs
utfs utfs utfs utfs utfs utfs
[b]utfs utfs utfs utfs utfs utfs
utfs utfs utfs utfs utfs utfs
utfs utfs utfs utfs utfs utfs
utfs utfs utfs utfs utfs utfs
utfs utfs utfs utfs utfs utfs
utfs utfs utfs utfs utfs utfs
utfs utfs utfs utfs utfs utfs
tx
[/b]

I hope its sunny tomorrow!

..oh and that Mr Martin is out and about in the sunshine and steps on a wonky paving stone that flips a bit filling with water and getting his shoe - and the bottom of his white trousers all wet.

I think you'll find you have the lines in incorrect order what you have as line 3 should be in line 2 and vice versa.

no it goes,

get some drinks in,
Get Some Drinks In!
GET SOME DRINKS IN FOR THE BOYYYS !!!
GET some drinks in for the boys.
[CHEER]

I hope he likes it but neglects to put a ring on it.

Win! Repped... :D

I hope that whilst he is wacking off over a photo of Victoria Pendleton he gets one of his pubes caught in that stupid gold bracelet he wears, putting him right of his stride.

Win! Repped... :D

+1 fucking great!

I hope he's cutting soldiers for a boiled egg and one of them ends up thinner than the others.

I hope the soldier he cut gets up and bayonettes him.

I hope the soldier he cut gets up and bayonettes him.

The thin lonely soldier or the fat one that looks like a cunt?