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I think you're playing it well red cross. No matter how certain you are about your feelings before you voice them, it doesn't prepare you for how you'll feel once they've been voiced. It's totally natural to feel remorse, regret, etc. Don't feel tempted to cow to these feelings without due thought, because that is a potentially destructive path to take for both you and your ex.
On a lighter note, I know your pain. I had almost as hard a time when I told my dearest flatmate turd furgurson that I wasn't gonna be living with him after our tenancy finished! :)
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Best way to get over someone is under someone*
*Not entirely true.
For example, if you end up being under that person?? Yeahhh...
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red cross the sooner you break it off the better, there is no point in cheating either of you out of time, especially when you are young. you will both feel like shit then bury your feelings in drugs, booze, bad choices, and dumb girls, then you will start to like being single, meet some one, enter a relationship, they will drive you to hell, and its back to booze, bad choices, and dumb girls. I think in the end you emerge from it all as a better person, who can "function socially" and feels "real emotions" this is called "growing up".
but what do i know, i really like dumb girls and bad choices.
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Well, after a few days I feel much better. It's like taking a weight off my shoulders. I really pushed myself hard in the gym yesterday and even raced some cars on the way home. In the last few weeks I could hardy exercise anymore.
I know it's corny, but this thread has help me through it when I was wavering. Thanks!
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So three months later - I am still feeling the pain - particularly since I found out that she ran off with the school cook - that smarted let me tell you - as did the string of friendly e-mails which once I found out about the blasted cook read like a list of their first dates all leading up to that weekend away together - - good things have happened too - I found out who my friends were - I have made new friends - infact I have made some very cool new friends - I am getting more spiritually aware and more present in my life - best of all I am reunited with my family that I had spent years pushing away - I can't see me getting a new girl anytime soon though - emotionally I am still all over the place ...buddha
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I was once told a good rule of thumb: "it takes about half the time half the time you were with someone to get over them". I think it works pretty well, though it obviously it depends what your personal definition is of "get over".
Another sound cliché is that "success is the best form of revenge". Revenge is a bit strong, but taking your mind off things by doing new stuff and meeting new people never hurts, however good-natured the break-up. Then you'll feel that you made the experience a useful and positive one. Glad to hear that things are going well on other fronts Buddha; the emails are one of those things that fucking sting in retrospect, but one day you'll look back on them and think of how petty / sordid they made the situation. Rise above! :)
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So three months later - I am still feeling the pain - particularly since I found out that she ran off with the school cook - that smarted let me tell you - as did the string of friendly e-mails which once I found out about the blasted cook read like a list of their first dates all leading up to that weekend away together - - good things have happened too - I found out who my friends were - I have made new friends - infact I have made some very cool new friends - I am getting more spiritually aware and more present in my life - best of all I am reunited with my family that I had spent years pushing away - I can't see me getting a new girl anytime soon though - emotionally I am still all over the place ...buddha
I split up with the ex 2 kids cost me £200k went on a 10 year fuckfest, orgies group sex 3 some's more some's you name it I experienced it. Had fun enjoyed it now have calmed down. Live life you will get over it lol
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oh he is so much worse than that. wait till you meet him!
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I split up with the ex 2 kids cost me £200k went on a 10 year fuckfest, orgies group sex 3 some's more some's you name it I experienced it. Had fun enjoyed it now have calmed down. Live life you will get over it lol
Fuck the break up posts, I want to hear more about the threesomes and orgies!!
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I split up with the ex 2 kids cost me £200k went on a 10 year fuckfest, orgies group sex 3 some's more some's you name it I experienced it. Had fun enjoyed it now have calmed down. Live life you will get over it lol
But I bet you feel all hollow and deadened inside.
No?
As you were, then.
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Ooh, you are awful.
No, I mean it. You are awful.
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How do you get over someone you still love?
Posted by
@the-smiling-buddha
Hey, been following your post & really feel for you. Stay strong & calm & choose your words carefully, communication is really key to salvaging a friendship with someone you obviously care for so much as you have pushed your own emotional wellbeing aside to facilitate his bubble. I find your actions admirable but as all the others say you are doing nobodies any favours in the long run, its all an emotional learning curve & you are taking the higher ground by being open heartedly honest. It will feel shit for a bit & you have been feeling crap for a while now, but the good news is there are sunnier days ahead! from reading between the lines of the first message you knew what you had to do, you just needed affirmation that it was right, I hope this gives you further suport in knowing that your actions only reflect well on you, I hope your partner comes round to seeing it this way in time, but for now, you are not lying to yourself or him & that makes you just about as good as you can get.