In the news

wish the uk would ban twitter

Was about to say '+1' but then realised it dosen't really affect me. It's like moaning about rubbish telly. Just don't watch it.

Irony explosion.

It's like ten thousand spoons exploding in a knife factory

Exactly.

http://www.newsshopper.co.uk/news/11094828.Bromley_woman_who_is__god_of_alien_race__was__engaged_to_Arsene_Wenger_in_the_15th_century_/?ref=mac

This is obviously a hugely important story. I can't believe that the national media haven't picked up on it yet.

Lives right by my Primary School. Clearly all true.

It's like ten thousand spoons exploding in a knife factory

Well, if you don't like spoons, just don't watch it.

John Carmack just got a new job at Facebook

http://www.prnewswire.com/news-releases/facebook-to-acquire-oculus-252328061.html

http://www.theguardian.com/lifeandstyle/2014/mar/25/gwyneth-paltrow-chris-martin-to-separate

I bet Chris Martin is sitting down to black pudding, sausage, bacon, fried bread, hashbrowns, beans, tomatoes, 3 eggs and chips this morning.

Yep. Washed down with a pint of Newcastle Brown Ale

I guess he just couldn't fix her

Meanwhile, in North Korea...

I'm rocking that look right now

"foodbanks not required because restaurants are fully booked" says thick, punchable tory pig-fucker.

http://www.crawleynews.co.uk/Conservative-councillor-says-doesn-t-believe/story-20843708-detail/story.html

Meanwhile, in North Korea...

Flippant yes, but it never gets boring reading what they're up to over there. Journos must be fighting over the communist desk after too long mired in dreary domestic politics.

"Our leader's haircut is very particular, if you will," one source tells Radio Free Asia.

This source is no longer living and Radio Free Asia is no longer broadcasting. Long live the new treachery.

Earlier, North Korea's state TV launched a campaign against long hair, called "Let us trim our hair in accordance with the Socialist lifestyle".

The best kind of satire is the type too far fetched to invent. I wear nothing but blind loyalty trousers and fear of death Y-fronts, topped off with a capitalist undercut with a dollar sign shaved into the rear.

http://www.crawleynews.co.uk/Conservative-councillor-says-doesn-t-believe/story-20843708-detail/story.html
Jesus Christ what an idiot:

There is a £26,000-a-year benefits cap – that equates to earning £36,000 a year before tax. There is something wrong if they can’t live on that.
Are you a fucking idiot? Do you really believe people who are relying on benefits are really taking home twenty-six grand a year? Whilst this statement is *strictly *true it's such an obviously stupid thing to say that there isn't even any point in pointing out how wrong what you are trying to imply is.

“Some people are finding it hard but everyone’s finding it hard.
Now you don't even know what you're trying to say. Some people or all people? Make your fucking mind up.

That guy would benefit from a cockpunch.

punchable tory pig-fucker.
Just needed reposting.

Meanwhile, in North Korea...

no point in me doing a same page repost so i'll just re

Meanwhile, in North Korea...

no point in me doing a same page repost so i'll just re quote it

twice

lol

http://www.belfasttelegraph.co.uk/news/health/homeopathy-products-recalled-because-they-might-contain-penicillin-30129463.html

"foodbanks not required because restaurants are fully booked" says tory councillor.

Wow. Fuck that guy.

someone better break the news to jim.

http://www.independent.co.uk/environment/nature/cider-drought-could-hit-uk-after-winter-storms-destroyed-acres-of-orchards-9217752.html

it's ok the herefordshire orchards are fine

propercyder

meanwhile in turkey
the nice liberal free thinking eu member

http://www.independent.co.uk/news/world/europe/turkey-versus-twitter-leader-tightens-grip-with-youtube-ban-to-silence-a-scandal-9219849.html

http://www.zerohedge.com/news/2014-03-27/here-youtube-false-flag-attack-syria-clip-erdogan-wanted-banned

good luck turkey
you'll need it

donation obviously not enough

http://www.standard.co.uk/news/london/tory-donors-plan-for-megabasement-with-pool-and-yoga-room-thwarted-by-two-trees-9218412.html

wonder how long before those trees get some nasty disease / die

or get "caught" with kiddy filth on their laptops...