Jokes / Joke du jour!

^ Ha!

Awesome.

My mate said, "Would it be wrong to lick your Grannies grumble?"
I said, "I don't know, it's a bit of a grey area."

A horse walked into a bar, the bartender asks why the long face......The horse, being a horse, thus not being able to comprehend the complexities of conversation, says nothing and then shits all over the floor..

I play triangle in a reggae band...

I stand at the back and ting.

I play triangle in a reggae band...

I stand at the back and ting.

cough
https://www.lfgss.com/post3602367-3395.html

Oops.

My mate said, "Would it be wrong to lick your Grannies grumble?"
I said, "I don't know, it's a bit of a grey area."

Bit of wee

...have not read the book yet - but is this what E. L. James' bestseller is about?

cough
http://www.lfgss.com/post3665951-24057.html

#%¥~

Why do bees hum?
Cos they can't keep a tune.

What type of bee makes milk?

A boobie.

^ ha!

..classic!

Q: What do you get if you cross a bee with a door bell?
A: A hum dinger!

I'm house hunting at the moment and tomorrow I'm off to see a house with period features. My wife hates it when I call her that.

^ awesome!

"Why do bees hum?
Cos they can't keep a tune."

surely it's because they don't know the words?

I met this guy trying to sell crash-damaged French team issue track bikes. I said you can't sell this junk, if anything they should be free. Well, he gave me a rather wounded L00K.

I got bored of being single, so I joined Uniform Dating.

Much to my annoyance, everybody was the same.

Rumour has it that Charles Saatchi and Nigella Lawson are going to open a fish and chip shop - she'll serve the customers and he'll do the battering.

You must spread some...

Got stung by a bee yesterday.

Forty quid for a jar of honey.

Ha.

No ha.