Accident, what to do?

Garbles is Indra AICMFP

You'll have to excuse the somewhat unsympathetic response of the other forumengers above. Many of us have been put in danger by people cycling as foolishly as you did and some of us have even been injured by such careless behaviour from other riders.

Too true.

^Point conceded, tho' I still couldn't put my hand on my heart and say that I'd never, ever been a dumbass in the past whilst cycling.

my face ran into a parked glass of whisky last night... carnage.

I'm still waiting on a reply from the Police, but can I expect to sue the persons that left it in such an irresponsible place where they knew that someone might be obstructed by it and how would I go about getting compensation for the reckless behaviour that ensued after it had passed through my face and out my urethra?

My bike seems to be ok but my liver, kidneys and cranium are experiencing all kinds of discomfort and although I'm suffering partial amnesia, I'm pretty sure that I was really messed up for a whole night because of the trauma and I was taken advantage of by a person or persons hitherto unknown who took advantage of my diminished state to touch me sexually then proceeded to leave chunks in my sink and a dirty pair of panties in my bathroom.

If anyone can offer advice on how to proceed I'd really appreciate it.

^Point conceded, tho' I still couldn't put my hand on my heart and say that I'd never, ever been a dumbass in the past whilst cycling.

If he'd posted in "Oh Shit", without the intention of claiming for damages, the general reception would be different. It's the "I demand satisfaction!" element that has made him a valid target.

my face ran into a parked glass of whisky last night... carnage.

I'm still waiting on a reply from the Police, but can I expect to sue the persons that left it in such an irresponsible place where they knew that someone might be obstructed by it and how would I go about getting compensation for the reckless behaviour that ensued after it had passed through my face and out my urethra?

My bike seems to be ok but my liver, kidneys and cranium are experiencing all kinds of discomfort and although I'm suffering partial amnesia, I'm pretty sure that I was really messed up for a whole night because of the trauma and **I was taken advantage of by a person or persons hitherto unknown who took advantage of my diminished state to touch me sexually **then proceeded to leave chunks in my sink and a dirty pair of panties in my bathroom.

If anyone can offer advice on how to proceed I'd really appreciate it.

The OP took pics...

If anyone can offer advice on how to proceed I'd really appreciate it.
Carefully package up all the whisky and send it to Landslide Towers, Yorkshire...

The OP took pics...

just checked all image recording devices in the vicinity for evidence. There is quite a lot of visual proof to corroborate my claims.

Can I get more money now? It looks like something was inserted in my anus and I was in a lot of pain.

We're you shouting or yawning when the insertion happened? Can't tell from the pictures.

Yes, the pics aren't best quality but it's obvious there's a lot of gaping happening in them.

Because of my enfeebled state I don't recall much of the subsequent collisions that occurred afterwards as a result, but suffice to say today there is clear after effects that are heinous and amount to physical damage not to mention the mental trauma.

Damn the person responsible for this terrible thing.

Sue the delivery driver who delivered the whisky.

yeah, the rape jokes thing? can we make it go away please.

? I think you're making a strange assumption that is contrary to the intended and to me, obvious, object of the joke which is in the refutal of personal choice and responsibility and the actions performed by people as a result because they think they can get some quick cash. At no point is rape talked about or suggested so if you're choosing to see it in that way you need to re-evaluate.

tl:dr fuck off somewhere else on your high-horse

I was riding behind a bus when I pulled out the left

Did it not occur to you at any point that the bus driver must have had a reason to be out of his lane?

Run out of rep today, all on this thread.

There was a perfectly placed ramp, and the bus driver bottled it.....?

Would'nt have happened in the bendy bus days.

he should have bmx bandit'ed that ramp

who are you calling a tramp Dicki? Sexism and domestic violence isn't funny, and neither is aids, homophobia or cholera.

Nor is teenage pregnancy, abortion, racism, gender-reassignment, global warming, the propagation of negative stereotypes based on nationality or creed, nor chemical warfare.

Please take your comments elsewhere.

...I was taken advantage of by a person or persons hitherto unknown who took advantage of my diminished state to touch me sexually...

It looks like something was inserted in my anus and I was in a lot of pain.

...there is clear after effects that are heinous and amount to physical damage not to mention the mental trauma.

Damn the person responsible for this terrible thing.

yeah, the rape jokes thing? can we make it go away please.

At no point is rape talked about or suggested...
Apart from the first quote, where you imply you were incapable of giving consent, followed by the second quote which mentions penetration and the third, acknowledging physical and mental trauma.

Whilst your point on "The refutal of personal choice and responsibility and the actions performed by people as a result because they think they can get some quick cash" may be valid, the analogy doesn't hold. You may wish to rethink...

TL;DR: "She was drunk" <> "She asked for it".

Apart from the first quote, where you imply you were incapable of giving consent, followed by the second quote which mentions penetration and the third, acknowledging physical and mental trauma.

Whilst your point on "The refutal of personal choice and responsibility and the actions performed by people as a result because they think they can get some quick cash" may be valid, the analogy doesn't hold. You may wish to rethink...

TL;DR: "She was drunk" <> "She asked for it".

The banter is top notch today…

Wow. The point of the joke is that i've clearly gotten myself pissed and done silly things that i'm now choosing to portray as somehow involuntary.

The 'she' your analogy is referring to is me, so no, it does not equate to 'she' asked for it, but rather 'I' drank the drink, 'I' got pissed, 'I' spewed, and 'I' did some kinky things as a result.

You can fumble away at the bra-strap of political correctness and good taste all you like, spill the pint of grammatical convention or spew forth conjecture about my intentions all you want, but it's you that is trying to turn this into a happy hour of moral outrage and it's more fucking boring than sitting in to watch hollyoaks with a six pack of diet coke and a bag of unsalted crisps, so please, desist.

Actually, this is why the internet is a fucking waste of time. Fuck off you gaping clunge holes of archived Guardian articles and moral superiority.

Boring cunts >>>>>>>>>>>>>>

Friday so soon?
.

he should have bmx bandit'ed that ramp

And thence over the bus, Evel Knievel-style