This morning's commute and other commuting stories

Stopping/slowing down not an option?

They were less than 10 metres away when they stepped out. So not really, no - I was squeezing on the levers anyway.

Haha, incredible. I always feel the urge to high-five people hailing buses but have resisted so far. I'd feel terrible if I gave some poor sod an open palmed slap to the head, they're already having a shit day if they're riding a bus, no need to make it worse.

I did this after a few pints when someone was hailing a taxi - shouted "High 5" as I went passed. It felt awesome

It's one of my favorite things in the world to do.

Yeah I dunno the deal. I could see no reason they crashed, other than the CIA, my ineptitude field or yes maybe a bag strap. All great suggestions. If I didn't feel so mysteriously sorry for them I'd be kind of amused. But crashing is all fun and games until you do it yourself. And I don't like to 'do it myself'

The stupid army guys who train in Green Park ruined the nice chilled out bit of my commute this morning by running from Buckingham Palace through to Hyde Park amongst all of the cyclists. There were around 50 of them and they used the cycle entrance into the park, which is usually a bit of a clusterfuck as it is. They then did sprint intervals alongside the cycle path that goes from Hyde Park Corner to Marble Arch, everytime they slowed down they drifted into the cycle path. Grrrr.

I sat on Central Line and read some more of Eileen Sheridan's autobiography 'Wonder Wheels'. It was pleasant. I wasn't punishment passed once, nor did I have to argue with any fat morons about why passing someone who's already overtaking another is a bad idea.

Guy was crossing on an amber and had spotted me charging towards him but carried on purposefully slowly.

Maybe he kept going because he had right of way and you should have stopped?

Rained today. Frontwheel slipped in the wet as I went up a micro-kerb from street level to bicycle lane at an angle way under 90°.
Somehow managed to stay on the bike, even though one foot touched the ground.

Maybe you could offer to show Hayden Roulston some moves?

Don't think my "oh shit - whoa - damn that was close" method would find many followers.. :-P

I love the ped freeze..

I can tolerate a lot on the road. Being purposefully driven off the road for no other reason then changing lanes the other week only resulted in me laughing and the over sized chunk of meat called "man" getting his blood pressure into the red, but ped freeze makes me wish large tables can teleport next to me on command just so I can rage flip them.

if you're going to do the deed, have the balls to commit. If I hit you, don't start shouting "it hurts", because I will want to do one of two things. Kerb stomp you, or laugh riotously at the bone sticking out of your face. Fucking zygote.

Just looked on my strava at the ride into work and 4 PRs and 2 2nd bests.

Won a discussion with a taxi driver this evening who did the classic cabbie u turn making me slam on the brakes.

Cabbie: "stop moaning and start pedalling." (I hadn't said a word)

Me: "that's no way to speak to a lady"

Cabbie: "well there was loadsa room, I bloody saw you, no need to worry,"

Me: "but how do I know you saw me, it can be quite a shock when someone suddenly does that"

Cabbie "yeah but I saw you"

Me "yeah but If I assumed that everyone on the road has seen me I'd be in a lot of trouble. Do you assume that everyone has seen you?"

Cabbie mulls it over and says "fair point love"

YES!

Winner!

I watched an Orangina can cross Marylebone Road this morning. On the green man, rolling within the bounds of the pedestrian crossing.

Conclusion: Aluminium cans are more intelligent than most people in London.

And many have beer in.

Just like cans

Lady on a mountain bike, in super hi-vis who after riding slowly into my back wheel, while I was waiting at a red light on Kennington Park Rd barking at me to go go go, decided that I was wasting time then tried to squeeze between me and the bus when this didn't work out, hopped onto the pavement call me an a-hole as she went by only to cycle off just narrowly avoid an on coming motorbike. Needless to say a few exchanged. Idiot

I got attacked by a plastic bag on Blackfriars Bridge this morning. It got stuck in my front mudguard and flapped ominously at my drivetrain. I shouted "fuck off! fuckofffuckofffuckoff" at it and it ignored me :(

Anyway, I managed to hook it off with my toe and it went for the boris biker behind me instead. Beware of feral bags, y'all

What a charmer you are ...

I had a plastic bag ambush predator pounce on my chain, wrap itself around my cassette and lock up my wheel, forcing an unplanned skid and knackering the rear mech in the process as it ungracefully tried to pass round the jockey wheels.
Luckily, however, inside the remains of the bag were a couple of mostly unscathed napkins so I could wipe my fingers after extracting shredded plastic from my cassette, so it wasn't all bad. Some bags may be feral but some of them still have a modicum of consideration for other road users.

Have had a similar situation with a "bag for life" those things can be deadly.

I got attacked by a plastic bag on Blackfriars Bridge this morning. It got stuck in my front mudguard and flapped ominously at my drivetrain. I shouted "fuck off! fuckofffuckofffuckoff" at it and it ignored me :(

Boffy this morning;

Then trying to get the bag off;