This morning's commute and other commuting stories

They clearly jelly of the skillz....

New black anti-car things on the super highway over Vauxhall Bridge, cue a lot of near misses between people overtaking and not realising they were there and normal people riding on the correct side of the road

^ Ditto on Blackfriars.

Commuted in on the MTB today as it needs a service. I forgot that the reason it needed a service was that the disc brakes were rubbing, which slowed me down considerably.

People also really don't like to be stuck behind a slow, fat knacker on a MTB. Cue a lot of undertaking and attempting to squeeze through non-existent gaps.

What is with all of the bus lane wankers now the sun is out?

There's nothing wrong with using a bus lane, keeping a sensible distance from the curb, or riding side-by-side when appropriate, but seriously - 4 or 6 abreast? Taking up the whole fucking thing?

It reminds me of this pic:

...accept where the cyclists ride in exactly the same formation as the cars.

On a more positive note, dude on a yellow PX Kaffenback, flat bars, x1, absolutely killing it this morning. Anyone on here?

Bloomin lovely. Turned the wrong way when I left the house. Ended up at work. Balls.

Some guy hovering about a foot behind and to the right of me this morning down one of the busier sections of my commute. Eventually I turn back and ask him to overtake or give me some room please, and he calls me a miserable wanker. Lovely. Tell him I've had my share of people almost causing crashes around me, his excuse is that he was admiring my bike :/

All well and good but not really an excuse to ride like a dickhead, is it

bike to work day - saw 2 more riders than the usual.....
#bikeveryday not #biketoworkday
guess thats why the latests stats for Scotland show decreased cycling in all sectors - despite SNP's "vision" of 10% all journeys by by 2020. (currently about 2.4%)

unforecasted headwind
#10minslate/10

Please look after each other guys!!

Whilst on the cs8 this morning I got taken off by another cyclist who decided to try and overtake me whilst I was turning off.

Ended up with a smashed phone and broken wrist.

More upset about getting knocked off by a cyclist on a dedicated cycle track. Some people need to lose this inflated ego of having to go faster than everyone when they are going to have to stop at traffic lights 10 seconds down the road

Cunty pointless overtaking is so not the one.

Had some twat decide that she really needed to push in on the way through the London Bridge deadlock this morning – just beyond pointless. Why the holy fuck anyone would see the need to weave between fellow cyclists moving slowly but steadily through gaps only wide enough for one bike at a time, i do not know.

Did you shoulder check and use hand signals?

I had opposite situation happen yesterday. I was passing a slower cyclist who decided to turn right with no warning. I managed to skid and turn with him so we only just touched and remained upright, but it was close.

I always wonder how these people make it through life so unaware.

I woke up in the night needing a piss and doing a full on left turn hand-signal out of the duvet. Good job too. Coming back to bed, met the missus going the other way and she wasn't even looking, let alone signalling as she squeezed past in the doorway.

@MetalMelly I'm confused. Are you saying you are one of those people who don't shoulder check or use hand signals when riding or driving?

"I'm confused. Are you..."

Yes

Got called a danger to myself and other car drivers by a lovely young lady in a soft top BMW who while on her phone decided to cut across me in order to get to the drive through McDs.

Ha. Met a charming old bat through Penge who insisted on trying to stop me merging whilst shouting, 'You're not a car, you're not a car..' over and over at the top of her cancer riddled lungs. That was all she could say.

Are Mono one of those wanky new "collectives". Watched a guy in full "mono", merrily cunting along, RLJing etc.

Also, it's too fucking hot and the ambient temperature in the changing room at work is hotter than it is outside ffs.

Did the long commute and bumped into a guy I've met a few times before, spent rather a lot of time sat on his wheel. Very warm, very sweaty. One bidon was about right for the ride in, but I reckon I'm gonna run out of water before I get home tonight.

Oh, and I took my mudguards off for the first time ever on this bike. Much less rattly and maybe a touch faster...

You've got a changing room? With ambience? I got changed in trap 2 after my Colombian engineer had dumped his weekend bbq non-digestibles. Then cleaned his teeth. Minty shite. Weird.

Close passed by a twunt in a work van/car this morning doing about 50 in a 30 zone. I gave him the wanker sign, he responded with an immediate middle finger salute.
Given his distance he must have been looking right at me to see my momentary shaking of the beans. Of course he then had to brake and wait for oncoming traffic until I was almost on his ass!
I started (bike) commuting again about three months ago. So far, my quest for just ONE clean commute without an altercation with a self entitled car / bus / van driver continues....

Clearly he was driving too fast, but why not just let it go? No point antagonising these Neanderthals.

And that is a lesson I'm trying so desperately hard to learn my friend.
I really don't want these incidents to ruin my enjoyment and I'm trying hard to learn to 'let things go'.
I hope that with time and perseverance I'll be able to do exactly that.

I can't let it go. Never. Even off the bike. On the train to a bbq in Godalming on Saturday I had words with a young lady sitting behind playing loud music in the quiet zone and a young lad sitting opposite who'd made himself comfy by placing his scruffy trainers up on the seat next to me. Both grunted but complied. My wife shrunk and cringed and wanted to leave. Then afterwards I overheard her telling friends at the barbie how I'd been so good about it all. This morning i had words with a BMW motorcyclist in the bike box in Regents Park. Not good enough my friend. Show some fucking respect. Don't wait until a tower burns down before getting all neighbourly and selfless. Just fucking do it. Rant over.

+1