Does Balki really exist?

Posted on
Page
of 8
  • i see.
    i used to get asked if i was australian when i lived in nashville. and also irish.
    mind you, i've also been asked if i was australian, by an australian, in london.

    i am not australian.

  • damo. Where are you from in Australia then?

  • perth.

  • I was once at the railway station in Hartford Connecticut and asked at a kiosk to buy a map of Hartford. The salesperson immediately handed me an apple Danish which, it transpired, was more use.

    I am not an Australian and neither was she.

    EPIC WIN!

    olcc

  • olcc

    ???

  • obligatory lower case capitals.

  • The strain of his double (or was it treble?) life started to show on Smithers. While during the day, when not waiting on the loathesome Schick, he rode all over London wearing the wretched tights or, Tynan-forbid, ungusset protected shorts, and typed, when not riding, in Schick's name or, when he had a moment, as Balki, at night he sat alone. Being Balki gave him new hope. The friendship and love that people showed his new character was refreshing and made him feel happy and whole. He wanted to be Balki but knew that he could never drop the image of Schick.

    He tried , once in a while to free himself of his problems by assuming new identities. Occasional aliases for rainy days but what he really wanted was to go out as Balki. To go out smiling and happy and speaking with the Australian accent that he had been practicing by watching reruns of Priscilla Queen of the Dessert. He had even had a dress made and bought make up. He wanted to be Balki, to dress like Balki and to dance like Balki. He wanted to go to West drinks like Balki, to North drinks like Balki and, most of all to South East Drinks like Balki. He thought of East and South drinks but felt that Balki would not feel at home at those. Smithers yearned to be Balki and yet his yearning was frustrated.

  • Did he get his just desserts?

  • I was trying to feed into the apple Danish story above...

  • Dunnys

  • The bar is set too high, Clive. I was never much good in English class.

    I'd love to hear more from you and Will though (not TSK as I find him threatening)

    I don't know why I bothered. Fuck you very much.

  • Balki, dear chap. I think you need to give some of your legendary kindness and love to BMMF. Straight away, please.

  • It's too late for that. In my mind, his autolysis has already begun.

  • An ability to autolyse presupposes existence.

  • I've seen things you people wouldn't believe.
    Attack whips on fire off the Hipster Highway.
    I watched C-spanners glitter in the dark near the polo court.
    All those moments will be lost in time, like chain oil in rain.
    Time to skid.

    Such a poet

  • Unclear photographic evidence of Balki's existence has now emerged. On the left in the first picture.

    http://static.londonfgss.com/attachments/19229d1261392068-_0011560.jpg

    http://static.londonfgss.com/attachments/19230d1261392743-_0011566.jpg

    Photography by cornelius blackfoot.

  • There is a limited poster edition in the celebs look a like thread.

  • Pretty fucking unflattering, that....

  • Doesn't he have any clothes?

  • or hair?

  • on his head, I didn't want to look elsewhere.

  • So does this mean that you now accept he exists, Clive?

  • Post a reply
    • Bold
    • Italics
    • Link
    • Image
    • List
    • Quote
    • code
    • Preview
About

Does Balki really exist?

Posted by Avatar for cliveo @cliveo

Actions