Any question answered...

I have had success with putting the frame on the ground (on some scrap wood), then using a long lever (big torque wrench).

If the frame is on the floor then the crank is also stopped by said floor, then you just need a long enough lever and a hench-person to hold the frame.

Got any lengths of scaffolding pole lying around? Very handy stuff. If the pedal's off the crank you can slip the scaff pole over the crank to use as a cheater bar and give you more leverage.

Unfortunately not. Though there is a scaffold outside my window right now that I could try stealing bits off in the dead of the night once the builders have fucked off, though I can't get the opposite pedal off either - I've just destroyed a pedal spanner trying, in fact. It's all warped and mangled and the bolt on the pedal hasn't moved a nanometer :-)

Are you sure you're undoing and not tightening the pedals by accident

runs away

That's far more common a mistake than a lot of people care to admit.

I have had success with putting the frame on the ground (on some scrap wood), then using a long lever (big torque wrench).

If the frame is on the floor then the crank is also stopped by said floor, then you just need a long enough lever and a hench-person to hold the frame.

This is a bit tricky because the chainring stops the bb from being able to rest on the floor. But the key there is probably the hench-person. Maybe the builders would like to help?

What clamp size do you need?

23.8mm or 22.2mm?

Actually skinnier than I thought, roughly measures at 20mm 0_o

That's far more common a mistake than a lot of people care to admit.

He asks me the same question every time because he's trying to be funny. The last time I had problems getting a pedal off, I took it to dammit's house, and it took dammit AND tommmmmmmmm both beasting it with a big spanner to get the (completely ungreased, as it turns out) threads to release. Branwen just doesn't believe me when I say I know how to remove a pedal because he thinks I'm an idiot :(

I see. It's still funny when people realise they're going the wrong way. I take extra care greasing pedals because I know if it's a stubborn bastard it's the wrong direction - one less thing to remember - winning.

On this one I've been trying to turn it both ways anyway since it's seized, in the vain hope that moving it in both directions will encourage the corroded bits to break away. But no, it's just going to trash my toolkit out of spite instead.

The bike is Australian, FWIW.

Whereabouts are you?

The bike is Australian, FWIW.

They're really stubborn fucks. What is it?

Can you just cut the offending parts off? #ouch

If you want to stop the other crank moving, get it just offset from the chainstay and stick a big bar of something between the two (and some padding between said bar and chainstay, you don't want a dented frame). This should give you moar leverage, you may run out of hands/ heavy things to hold things in place though.

I see. It's still funny when people realise they're going the wrong way. I take extra care greasing pedals because I know if it's a stubborn bastard it's the wrong direction - one less thing to remember - winning.

Almost as funny as a colleague who came to see me the other day complaining that she couldn't get the pedal off her bike. She'd loosened the pedal axle with an allen key, and was spinning the pedal body round and round and round wondering why it wasn't coming off.

That reminds me of how I used to remove freewheels..

I once came home to find two housemates claiming the wall was "too hard" for them to drill holes in, for some shelving...

Turns either neither of them had heard of the existence or purpose of a chuck and the drill was just spinning wildly around a loose bit..

Ha, one of my friends borrowed my drill once, they failed to finish the DIY as it was taking so long to drill through the wall.

It would have been quicker if the drill hadn't been set to go in reverse and at a top speed...

On this one I've been trying to turn it both ways anyway since it's seized, in the vain hope that moving it in both directions will encourage the corroded bits to break away. But no, it's just going to trash my toolkit out of spite instead.

The bike is Australian, FWIW.

Have you had Indra ride it yet?

Whereabouts are you?

Balham.

They're really stubborn fucks. What is it?

Can you just cut the offending parts off? #ouch

It's a Repco Continental, basically like this only without the rack, guards, streamers and spokies: http://farm4.staticflickr.com/3476/4564398028_664b840da6_z.jpg

I haven't got any cutting tools or a workshop to keep them in so I'm limited to fairly basic methods until I give up and take it somewhere with proper tools. There's a tyre shop right next door to a bike shop locally so those two will be my next ports of call once other options are exhausted.

If you want to stop the other crank moving, get it just offset from the chainstay and stick a big bar of something between the two (and some padding between said bar and chainstay, you don't want a dented frame). This should give you moar leverage, you may run out of hands/ heavy things to hold things in place though.

Ah, yeah - that was another thing I tried, using a big spanner to brace the crank against the chainstay. Running out of hands was exactly what happened - it's not easy to hold it down with one while levering with the other!

Have you had Indra ride it yet?

It's the components I want broken, not the frame!!!!

This is a bit tricky because the chainring stops the bb from being able to rest on the floor. But the key there is probably the hench-person. Maybe the builders would like to help?

Does the poor bike have a pair of wheels on it?

Try this:

• Fit wheels to bike
  
• Take bike into street
  
• Rest opposite pedal on the curb so that when you turn the bolt in the desired direction the pedal fouls the curb, preventing the crank from rotating
  
• Attach cheater bar / wrench / whatever
  
• Hold bike down firmly by saddle / bars / top-tube with both hands
  
• Use foot to repeatidly stamp down on cheater in desired direction
  

Realistically waving it at a load of builders while doing a damsel in distress face, however unPC, may well work..

Well, it will get the cranks off, no idea about the condition of the bike after. Also tea an biccies might be involved.

Got any lengths of scaffolding pole lying around? Very handy stuff. If the pedal's off the crank you can slip the scaff pole over the crank to use as a cheater bar and give you more leverage.

In the absence of easily available scaff - a hoover tube makes a very acceptable alternative to up the leverage.

The problem is not lack of leverage - it's inability to stop the crank from rotating with the cheater or wrench. As I understand it, anyhoo.

QUESTION: which car hire company is a) not shit and b) open on a MONDAY?

Boggles the mind that a moderately popular car hire company is closed on Monday. FFS.

put some pipe over the crank, get a big wrench and get one person to hold each.

Max leverage.

If you need a hand later I should be free. Just send a PM.

Take the chainring off, rest the BB on a bit of 2x4 (liberated from the builders), that'll raise the BB high enough that the spider arms won't hit the floor but the cranks will.

Apply LEVERAGE