Any question answered...

What are my options?

1: Tape
2: "Keirin" style grips, e.g. Genetic Vein
3: HTFU and force MTB grips onto them

Why, all over Europe, do shoe makers also offer key cutting services?

I've heard various answers, including something to do with tax categories when you setup a business, but no definite one yet.

BONUS: How do you recognize a communist?

BONUS: How do you recognize a communist?

collective sigh

As long as they're not lock on grips, you'll be fine.

BONUS: How do you recognize a communist?

Is it their shoes?

Why does my left ankle sometimes hit the chainstay?

Because you have poor bike-kicking technique. Try hitting it with a sledgehammer instead.

What 700c tyre should I get for the back wheel of my polo bike?

It needs to be able to take about twenty stone, be slick, doesn't really need to deal with wet much, grippy's good though, I like to over inflate tubes and I don't like fixing punctures.

It was previously a marathon plus (see last point) but as I'm no longer commuting 30 miles a day on the polo bike something lighter is a good idea. Between 25-28mm.

Is there a perfect tyre?

Folding Hardshell or pasela?

What 700c tyre should I get for the back wheel of my polo bike?

It needs to be able to take about twenty stone, be slick, doesn't really need to deal with wet much, grippy's good though, I like to over inflate tubes and I don't like fixing punctures.

It was previously a marathon plus (see last point) but as I'm no longer commuting 30 miles a day on the polo bike something lighter is a good idea. Between 25-28mm.

Is there a perfect tyre?

durano

Its a right turn off 4 me. On my old xp laptop anyway

Speedplay Zero Stainless Steel, or Look Keo 2 Max Carbon?

Why, all over Europe, do shoe makers also offer key cutting services?

Pubs are too busy serving ale to spivs, the bookies are too busy selling bets to those that can least afford it and all the shops are too busy chasing shoplifters. That leavers just butchers, hairdressers and a few others able to diversify into key-cutting. Butchers are harassed maniacs with sharp knifes. Any key cut from their chubby hand would be too roughshod, and likely covered in their blood and that of a cow. A customer would complain about this, I suspect.

A hairdresser is too busy daydreaming about next Saturday night out to care about your keys, or your hair. Their career is a permanent audition for the day they're plucked from the obscurity of a salon to the glory of a theatre stage, where they can make graceful swipes with a pair of scissors and toss about a comb as if it's a scalding hot iron-rod, in front of an audience with perfectly good house-keys already in their suburbia-creased trousers. Plus hairdressers live with friends only because they're incapable of opening a locked door on their own - wave a key in front of their nose and they'd look more gone out than usual.

Speedplay Zero Stainless Steel, or Look Keo 2 Max Carbon?

I'm getting the latter, not that it means anything.

Speedplay are a fucking pain
Get Keos

^Had thought, speedplays need constant care. and cleats are hardly appropriate for a student budget...

Just fitting the fucking cleats is enough to put me off

So you're a student now! Congrats

IKR, how did this happen...

speedplays are the best pedal if you want to be able to dial in the cleat position most accurately

speedplays are awesome.

^^I don't know what I'm doing and can't afford a bike fit.

really easy to install

look online for guides if you struggle

durano

Durano PLUS

Speedplay Zero Stainless Steel, or Look Keo 2 Max Carbon?

fucking shimano spd sl's for £25 at the moment inc. cleats, free postage. Not tres sexy but still the deal, steal, sale of the fu...

got them as a stingy stopgap but actually quite pleased after several years of rapey Time cleat prices. Tres stable. Pas tres chere. J'aime beaucoup.

"I don't know what I'm doing and can't afford a bike fit."

Not to worry, nothing beats the famous LFGSS interwebz bike fit™.