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twist-n-go polo!
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H does not have a Beckham beard!
there is no way on gods earth its clever which leaves... the Rafa...
"He is using it to hide his double chin and to replace further down his face what he's lost on top of his head"
MMmmm
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shockhorror Polonium might even win a game! shockhorror
Easy MrLime. one step at a time yeah...
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Gabes has a point there
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Malice versus Zombie.
A pre-game talk clarified the rules, specifically the back through the goal rule, hopefully removing any possibility of conflict later on.
Game 1.
Play opens with a fast joust, Zombie quickly take control, with deft use of his team mates Mike gives malice the run around and opens the scoring at 0.59
Malice quickly regain possession and composure, countering with a goal at 1.17(Iain).
A clean games ensues, vidal stacks in the same corner as the Malice/Black Rebel game. Both teams are playing at an even level, the display of passing/checking and interceptions is impressive to watch, surpassed only by ZU's goal keeping.
At 10.39 Mike sinks another ball into Malice's goal.
Play is stopped by the referee as Iain hits the deck in what will hence forth be known as death corner. Players and spectators alike look concerned,Iain comments that he's broken his ass bone. Aware that the time is ticking and they're close to losing this game Iain remounts his bike, possession of the ball is awarded to Malice.
Vidal takes the ball, Lebowski runs up the left of the court, Iain takes up place in goal. Vidal hits the ball into death corner. Iain is heard sarcastically commenting, "Well done, hit it into the slidy corner".
One minute of play left, Matt scores a beautiful equaliser (nine seconds later).
Both teams realising this game could go either way pick up the pace. (Yorgo does even bigger, faster circles).
Fifteen minutes is gone. Iain argues with the referee that there is no golden goal and that the game is a draw. His team mates correct him. he pulls his head back into the game and scores at 15.49.
Three - Two to Malice (Yorgo has the lowest footdown count of Zombie).
**
Game 2.**The joust, Yorgo gets to the ball first and taps it straight back to mike and his own goal. Mike was unaware that Yorgo would be employing a new tactic and the ball sails past him. Malice are bearing down towards the ball and an almost inevitable goal.
Hassan pivots out of goal and lunges forward on his bike, reaching the ball fractions of a second prior to Malice. Hassan is a hero, Yorgo is a tool.Both teams seem evenly matched. Every break away is caught and prevented. Every shot on goal is knocked clear by the defenders.
Lebowski score the first goal at 6.11
Zombie have the ball, malice intercept, zombie intercept, repeat to insanity.Lebowski has a break and charges towards ZU's goal. Vidal shouts, "Finish it motherfucker", Yorgo interjects, "Penis". The shot goes wide.
Hassan receives a beautiful pass from his team mate and makes good at 8.30
Malice grab the ball, drive hard down the court and score thirteen seconds later.
In, what is now the accustomed manner, both teams charge around the court alternatively blocking then attacking. Mike brings the game back level at 11.38
Malice start to bitch at each other.
(I am laughing, this fixture is enjoyable)Vidal scores at 13.46 in what can only be described as a perfect team effort.
ZU retain possession of the ball for most of the remaining time but can't seem to sink that goal.
Three - Two to Malice (Yorgo now has the most footdowns in Zombie, Iain topping it with an extra bringing his FFD (Fixture foot down) to 8)
Game 3.
ZU want this game.
Malice want this game.
That's a conflict of interest if ever I saw one.Yorgo opens the scoring at 4.36, much to mike's distress it's into their own goal.
A mere 19 seconds later Mike pulls the game even again (4.55)At 9.53 Iain has the ball in ZU's half of the court. Vidal shouts from his own goal, "Do a trick, pop a wheelie". Iain scores, the wheelie or trick were painfully absent (I briefly consider disallowing the goal).
Malice are back in control of the ball after a sweet intercept, The ball is offensively shuffled from midcourt through Zombie's goal. Iain attempts to claim ZU own goal, teh goal ref disagrees. ZU were no where near the ball so couldn't have touched it.
During the next couple of minutes Yorgo hits lebowski with his mallet, minor bitching occurs.
Lebowski scores a two goals at 10.29 & 12.43
Hassan was checking well, the second drive by Hassan, mike responds and scores at 13.13ZU take up heavy residence in their own goal. All three players practically leaning on each other, Vidal to the big L, "Take 'em all out at once!" Lebowski looks confused and does nothing of the sort (He is a gentleman).
The score is 4 - 2 to Malice.
One minute left and ZU have possession.At 14.14 into the game the lights cut out. SHIT!
Mike approaches me and says he's happy to call it game.
I take a quick vote.Three say call it. (M, I, A)
Three say they want to finish. (V, Y, H)
We debate what to do. Another court? Play in the dark? Play in the lit walkway running between the court and the little park?Hassan decides to change his vote. The vote is 4 to 2, as is the final score of the game.
Four - Two to Malice.
**Post Game.
**Mike calls Vidal a cheat as he didn't rewturn to his D after any goal was scored.
Vidal agrees.
Mike votes to cancel all three games, Bitching ensues.Everyone retires to the Northgate (Mike & Vidal included).
10.34pm Still Bitching.
10.42 Lebowski "is out due to the dildo", "Hahaha, Christ" (NB, we were discussing the Haloween tournament after party).
10.43 Lebowski, "I didn't know polo would be like this"
10.43.07 Vidal, "Sloppy 7th!"Final Tally.
Footdowns GoalsMike 9 5
Yorgo 13 -1
Hassan 8 1Iain 13 3
Vidal 10 3
Lebowski 3 3It should be noted that three of Iain's dabs were direct takeouts by Yorgo.
The sorry count it unknown.
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Love it EM! good work man
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amazing write-up em, hilarious! nice work malice, back on form? hahaha! zombie, wtf? yorgo rumored to be on the transfers list. haha!
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Em, thanks for reffing, it took a fearless being to ref after Monday night's palaver. And thanks for the creative* write-up of events.
Thanks Mike, Yorgo and Hassan for a tough, hard-fought, but clean, game. Shame we didn't get to play out the final 46 seconds, but it was better calling it quits than playing under the light of local fireworks.
*complete inaccuracy of some facts, but wouldn't be as entertaining if corrected. : )
Mrlemon
mattmadegood
Greasy_Slag
moog
aufbruch
Object
tomasito
emab
playswellwithotters-
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This week's fixtures & results League II (winter 2009/2010)
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@turnpedal
the longer the growth, the more manly the man... or rather, what the man wants you to think about said man. manliness. grr.