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True enough, but there's a time and a place for acting like an arsehole.

Speaking of which, are you in the smoke these days?

^ amazing.

@Stonehedge whatever your feelings about the way you dealt with your own bullies be thankful you had the choice.
My school life was an utter misery. Once I started secondary school I was mercilessly bullied every day until the day I left. I, however was too small and weedy to fight back (I was a mere 4ft6 and 4.5 stone at the age of 14). The idea that there was anything whatsoever I could have done to stop it happening is completely risible. I would have given absolutely anything to have been able to inflict violent retribution on my tormentors and I would have welcomed anyone else doing the same. And yes, it would have almost certainly solved the problem.

Ask Freud...

Ha, touché

Bullies will exploit any point of difference to get at another kid, and if they get a reaction they'll keep going for that point. It's like chickens with the sight of blood - as soon as one bleeds, the others go a bit crazy and peck at the wound.

Oh, sure. It does seem as if it was 'successful' in that the angle inflicted deep wounds on her, but I was just speculating what the real, underlying motivation could have been for bullying her. Now, obviously, some children emulate their parents, who may hold such xenophobic views, but I doubt that this would have been the only thing that would have given rise to the bullying.

The kids who beat the shit out of me every day for years were much smaller than me, but fair point. I think I see what you're saying.

This. So much all of this.
Also, if I stepped in it would be mega lozzles.

A couple of the guys that used to beat the shit out of me apologised recently when I went to a friend's funeral, I'm well over it but was nice to see them realise they were cunts and take the piss out of them a bit. At school I didn't usually respond with violence, I usually let them get on with it then carry on with my day. One time one of the cunts went for my face while I was on the floor getting kicked so I got up and chased him off, that was lulz. Another time I slightly beat up 4 kids in the year below me who thought they could have a go, I also remember the last time I punched someone in the face in anger was at school and still feel bad about it, despite it being in retaliation, he got married recently.

#angerleadstohate

Everyone says violence is not the answer, but rarely follows up with what the correct answer is

Everyone says violence is not the answer, but rarely follows up with what the correct answer is

Channeling your anger into something that will allow you to transcend the situation. Even if it will take some patience.

What is that ^

Katie Hopkins hanging out with holocaust-denying, NWO-fetishising, alt-rightists who want to disrupt the refugee rescue operation and dump as many of them as they can back in Libya.
https://www.wesearchr.com/bounties/defend-europe-identitarian-sar-mission-on-the-libyan-coast

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Are we talking something like martial arts or meditation?

Yeah, kids should try to be the karate kid, because that's just documentary fact.

Or, completely unrealistically, they could channel their anger into their studies so they can escape the cunts by having more life choices

I'm not trying to be a dick, I'm genuinely looking for advice that a child would understand and can realistically act upon.

With respect, channelling your anger into studies doesn't sound like a solution. If anything, it could increase the child's sense of isolation and potentially invite even more bullying.

I wasn't joking when I suggested martial arts. Apparently it's great for improving self-confidence, and ideally you wouldn't even have to use it.

If anything is going to teach you to avoid conflict, taking up karate (or similar) will. Possibly.

Depending on how seriously you take all that Bushido noise.

It will also help you to count to ten in Japanese.

Yes martial arts can work. Not my first hand experience but i know my kung fu teacher works with kids 1 to 1 specifically to help them deal with bullying. It's not so they can fight back. It's more for mental resilience so the kid is less damaged, and dealing with anger/frustration, although part of it is the self-confidence that practical self defence brings.

Martial arts is great, I went to kung fu classes for a couple of years as a teen... Great for fitness and makes school bullies think twice before having a pop... My master told me he'd find me and kick the crap out of me if he ever heard I'd been using my sweet kung fu skills against anybody... I never did... Run away and if they catch you, kick 'em in the nuts, then keep running...

I misread your comment. Thanks for the clarification.

Yes, the studying thing doesn't necessarily help with the bullying short term. It's better than putting another kid in hospital, was my point. But I see what you mean about martial arts. Wish someone had suggested that logic to me at 11.

So a grown threatened you with violence if you ever used violence against someone your own size?

Channelling your anger into anything that isn't self destructive is pretty hard when you're a child. I know I didn't manage. How do you channel anger into your studies when you cannot concentrate at school because you're watching your back all the time? (And when you're just not very good academically)

I'm going to totally Godwin this conversation now by saying that if meeting violence with more violence didn't solve anything then we'd all be speaking German now.

I was arguing that focusing on how to get out of the situation is better than putting other kids in hospital. I still think that. I see the strength of giving kids better skills to be resilient to the bullying, though.

As for the ability to focus on studying - I dunno, I managed it, but that's just my personal experience. It wasn't much fun, admittedly.

I think at a certain age, a punchup as a last resort can resolve things but I suspect you don't teach a child that before said punchup occurs.
No need to hospitalise anyone either, restraint looks cooler than totally losing it and scaring classmates.