In the news

http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-england-shropshire-38598845
I feel sorry for the guys that had to move the thing.

Love the definition of treasure.

"Somebody put them in there and either died and didn't tell anyone or something else happened."

guns are not a problem

http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/world-us-canada-38608272

so they would not go and knock on his door until he truly has failed the 24 hrs bit.

Giving him just enough time to sober up...

http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/world-africa-38587655

Article on South Africas 'Battle with Booze' on the BBC contains the little factoid

'It has been reported that there are often more watering holes in poor areas than libraries or schools. '

The poor savages, just imagine that... Did the author stop and think what they were writing..? you'd be hard pushed to find anywhere that schools and libraries outnumber 'watering holes'

And so it should be as well!

a situation exacerbated by the now illegal but by no means eradicated 'dop' system that results in widespread foetal alcohol syndrome among many of the Cape Coloured community.

best to avoid south african wine unless you can verify that the producers don't still employ this practice.

I had to look that up...part-paying people in wine (harddrugs) what could POSSIBLY go wrong...

not restricted to wine farms either. avoid cape apples.

in fact, pretty much anything and anyone from that part of the world should be avoided.

Same as Jwestland ^ didn't know about this, thank you for the eye opener

You could easily solve it though. Reduce the size of schools so that their premises are no bigger than your average boozer. Aim for each school to serve the needs of between 20 - 100 children. Employ 2 - 5 Australians per school on zero hour contracts. Scatter them around willy nilly. Presto you have the same number of schools as you have 'watering holes'. Progress.

Employ 2 - 5 Australians per school

And who's meant to work in the pubs then?

we can always make more australians by sending our convicts over again.

Haven't you lived there? :)

exactly.

Ned Boulting has written a good email to Grayling - and is happy for everyone to use the same..

https://thejerseypocket.cc/2017/01/13/dear-mr-grayling/

Trump risks 'war' with Beijing if US blocks access to South China Sea, state media warns

https://www.theguardian.com/world/2017/jan/13/trump-risks-war-with-beijing-us-blocks-access-south-china-sea-state-media

mine went more like this:

Dear Mr Grayling.

I am disappointed to hear in the media that as Minister for Transport
you do not consider cyclists to be “road users”. I understand that
you had a recent encounter where you 'doored' a passing cyclist and
didn't abide by the law on passing your details to the victim of this
collision, so perhaps I shouldn't be surprised that your personal
attitude, despite your responsibilities, carries over into your
political views.

Regardless of your personal beliefs, you are paid to represent all
road users. As a driver, cyclist and pedestrian, and unfortunately
sometimes a victim of our de-nationalised train system, I don't
distinguish between forms of road use because in essence, all people
are using it for the basic activity of getting from A-B, and all
people contribute to its upkeep via general taxation.

Your comments fly in the face of generations of political policy in
trying to encourage economical and healthy forms of transport, and
betray a personal prejudice that has no place being in the position of
power you find yourself in.

If you have decided that you and your ministry no longer represent
cyclists then I would be most ingratiated for you to adjust the tax
allocation towards the upkeep of the transport system accordingly,
and, to quickly provide a much better improved system of segregated
cycle lanes that will allow cycle travel throughout the UK without
being forced to cohabit roads that you do not believe are designed or
fit for cycle use.

Alternatively, you could revise your public statement, apologise for
the miscomprehension of your ministerial brief, and take greater care
in future when articulating yourself in discussion of your remit. And
of course, remember to look in the mirror before opening the door of
your free ministerial Jaguar.

Yours in despondency,

A+ Would read again, would recommend, would definitely plagiarise.

0/10. New pages can go and fuck a dog.

I really wouldn't worry about war with China. WWIII will be over so quickly, it shouldn't be too stressful. Just a moment of "oh fuck" when the first flash happens.

https://youtu.be/MrHoMSRZOS4

https://www.theguardian.com/society/2017/jan/14/health-service-in-crisis-cancer-ops-cancelled-nhs

More bad poll news for Jeremy Corbyn came in the form of a ComRes survey for the Sunday Mirror and the Independent, which revealed that 43% of respondents thought the Tories would be better at managing the NHS this winter, compared with 31% who thought Labour would.

I give up.

Who do they ask? Who thinks that the Conservatives, who have a track record of running down public services in order to sell them off cheap to their friends and relatives, are even trying to do a good job?