Bird Advice

This is a lot more interesting than the 'going to a mosque' thread which is still going on in the Private section.

This part of your reply let you down.

I'll take it back

*
Can I just say people on this forum are a bunch of cunts

You just did!

well thanks for your call and we all hope you find happiness in the future..

meanwhile here's the Clash..and watch out for that armadillo!*

YouTube - The Clash - Rock The Casbah

May I formally congratulate you on rescinding the latter portion of your previous declaration.

Right I'll see you cunts later, I'm off on the pull

You need to get into the right headspace to ponder situations like this. I always found that a bit of crack, a couple of Es, a microdot, a few hash pipes, half a bottle of tequilla, and a few pints brought more clarity to women-related issues.

This is a lot more interesting than the 'going to a mosque' thread which is still going on in the Private section.

I disagree, but both of them are basically about hitting on chicks...

kick her in the cunt and tell her to be grateful if she starts grizzling.

Kick a lady in the vent? Outrageous.

You need to get into the right headspace to ponder situations like this. I always found that a bit of crack, a couple of Es, a microdot, a few hash pipes, half a bottle of tequilla, and a few pints brought more clarity to women-related issues.

No such thing as a 'bit' of crack...

No such thing as a 'bit' of crack...

You know, just a rock. Not a whole session with guns and prostitutes and early jungle.

kick her in the cunt and tell her to be grateful if she starts grizzling.

wtf?

polar views are necessary for a good debate.

Well, I'm a happily married man, thanks to a drug fuelled one-night-stand lasting 15 years.

I realise my approach might not work for everyone.

I PUT MY HUGE GREAT NAILED SHOES ON AND I KICKED HER! AND I KICKED HER IN THE CUNT FOR HALF A FUCKING HOUR 'TIL I WAS EXHAUSTED! AND THEN I SAID, "DOLLY! WILL YOU GET A POLAROID OF THAT?!" And the cunt wouldn't even get up!

.

Blow your tits up.

She nails herself up on a cross. Doesn't half give me the fuckin' horn.

I think your mate Phillipe is railing her on the sly.

Get "the Game" and run some Mystery Method on her bitch ass; pick her up, slam her down, tick her off. Move on.

Like Object said, HTFU; and she's a saffa too so she's most likely off her tits

Does this win the 'Shittest, Most Tedious Thread Award' or does that go to the 'I'm Looking For My First Fixie, Advice Needed' thread?

Does this win the 'Shittest, Most Tedious Thread Award' or does that go to the 'I'm Looking For My First Fixie, Advice Needed' thread?

this was a lot more entertaining then most discussions.

Does this win the 'Shittest, Most Tedious Thread Award' or does that go to the 'I'm Looking For My First Fixie, Advice Needed' thread?

No, 'Going to A Mosque' is still sweeping the field...
;-(

I reckon jimmy fingers lost out to donny the knob or possibly dildo dan.

You know where she works and you know where she lives, send flowers or chocolates and then phone to ask if she got them.
Failing that stalk her, bombard her with weird threatening messages and burn her house down.

When my 'bird' chucked me, I stalked her until she moved to LA.
Found her again there, wore her down and now we're married

[cue Our Tune music]

Creepy stalking is always worth a go, IMO.

[cue Our Tune music]

Creepy stalking is always worth a go, IMO.

I don't know that song. Who wrote and recorded it?