Don't bite your nails

nope i got it wrong, sorry all,
apparently he's moved to america and is trying to trace his family treeeeee!!

what do you think is at the root of his condition...

I was going to post something sensitive and sympathetic about that poor man's awful affliction and suffering.

But why go against the grain?

you lot are barking mad…

Thanks for the help with the bold, slamm. It made the joke much more *plane*. :-)

leaf it out, we were only joaking....

well if you want to joke why not make your own splinter group?

all that media coverage has made him quite poplar

"His wife left him"

he still pines for her

he even has his own blog

he sends her sappy love poems to try and get her back

slamm "His wife left him"

he still pines for her

yeah - he gave her the needle

maybe he should try a fir coat to win back her love

i wonder if he has sewn his seeds??
if so would the little sprigs shoot up??
or will they look like their dad??
well they say that the apple doesn't fall too far from the...........oops

Chip off the old....

What's happened here?
Go out for a boozy lunch,
Let down your garden all hell breaks loose!!!

Acacia hadn't noticed, I'm getting sycamore crappy puns and will probably be branching out into another thread - shouldn't I, orchard I?

Vine by me...

Ivy leaf I can fly, ivy leaf I can touch the sky...

shame his wife didn't stay with him - after all, love conkers all...

come on now guys, enough. this is getting ridiculice

geez all the smart remarks from people coming out of the woodwork!

double whammy from you dogs with that avatar

BringMeMyFix Ivy leaf I can fly, ivy leaf I can touch the sky...

Heroic.

but seriously, if you were OCD, imagine how much fun it would be trimming the growths!!