Jokes / Joke du jour!

good to see a plantagenet come together.

That's the punchline, can't remember the rest.

What's the difference between an egg and a wank?

You can't poach a wank.

I like a nice soft boiled wank with soldiers.

I like a nice soft boiled wank with soldiers.

I'd always thought there was something a bit funny about you.

Was that before or after you gobbled it all down?

pm me

Semen BASED?! That implies that the bulk of those recipes is semen. The chef must have a dozen blokes wanking away in battery cages 24/7.

Not necessarily human spaff

What would you put in the special sauce if the customer knows they're eating baby gravy?

hp

"give it to me!" she screamed. "Give it to me now! I'm so fucking wet!"

She could scream all she wanted, I was keeping the umbrella.

Booked a table for me and the missus for Valentine's Day. She's going to go mental when she finds out. She fucking hates snooker!

What's the difference between a wank and a game of snooker?

You can't pocket a wank..

Wait..

What's the difference between a wank and a game of snooker?

You can't snooker a wank.

No.. Wait a sec

Nah.. It's not working.. Sorry..

What's the difference between a wank and a game of snooker?

I don't cry when I play snooker.

Hang on...

Snooker, what a load of balls...

What's the difference between a wank rag and a snooker table?

The snooker table is covered in her cum

What's the difference between a wank and a game of snooker?

Choking myself until I nearly pass out makes snooker worse.

What's the difference between a wank and a game of snooker?

I'm still allowed to play snooker in schools.

What's the difference between a wank and a game of snooker?

The toilets at work are not the best place to play snooker.