I hate

Mouth ulcers.

Biting the ulcer, so you get another. Then repeating this process several times.

That my lip has now swollen up to comical (ha-de-fucking-ha) size.

Jeremy Clarkson and Top Gear.

I couldn't sleep last night so in a bid to find something to watch I stupidly (i know i know) clicked a a new series of Top Gear. It was predictably shit from the get go; scripted "banter" and rehearsed "happenings". Bead necklaces, shaggy mid-life-crisis hair, paunches, boot-cut jeans, casual racism and crap similes about tacky footballer's cars that cost more than most of us will earn in half a decade. I really don't know why I bothered. But then Clarkson made reference to the English football fans mocking the Americans over the Deepwater Horizon disaster and referred to their "You're not *swimming *any more" (see what they did there?) chant as "Brilliant!". Chortling away, he seemed to be revelling in the fact that not only had a dozen people died in presumably horrible agony, but that hundreds of thousands would lose their livelihoods and huge swathe of unique ecosystem has been potentially destroyed forever. Haha! But it's funny because they're AMERICANS, i.e. not us. In fact I got the distinct impresison that it was even more lol-worthy to him and his audience because this disaster had been inflicted by a British owned company. Ha!

I've tried to write it off as part of a constructed persona, pandering to a certain demographic or whatever, but fuck it... the biggest star at the BBC got the boot last year after mildy insulting one bewildered old man on some obscure podcast. Clarkson gets up on primetime terrestrial BBC and makes a gloating, xenophobic joke about an ongoing social, environmental and potential economic disaster and no-one bats a fucking eyelid?

I'm not ashamed to say i've just comlained to the BBC about it. For the first time too. Maybe i'm getting old or whatever, but I can't stand that that revolting, bigoted, hate-mongering CUNT is what passes for mainstream entertainment in this country.

Bead necklaces, shaggy mid-life-crisis hair, paunches, boot-cut jeans

There's no strength left in the world of Men

/Saruman

I really hate geared noddders on very expensive bikes wearing rapha who sit on your wheel (that in istelf isn't a prob) but who overlap your rear wheel so that if you need to move out you can't because the bellend can't read the road and can't spot hazzards coming up.

Yeah but if the wheels touch, it'll be him who goes on his arse, and it'll be his fault. He'll also look a complete pillock.

Look over your shoulder, indicate, move. They can't really blame you if you make your intentions that clear can they?

Ah I always thought it was me that would go over, good to know for future... Did look, did indicate did make my intentions clear but he sat there. He needs cycle training!

Phosphorylated proteins.

Phosphorylated proteins.

Fuck them. Fuck them in their fucking asses.*

*over-zealous responses for comic effect may not be actual opinions.

I hate slow delivery (for no reason) and not being given a bloody tracking number.

I want my new bike!

Jeremy Clarkson and Top Gear.

I couldn't sleep last night so in a bid to find something to watch I stupidly (i know i know) clicked a a new series of Top Gear. It was predictably shit from the get go; scripted "banter" and rehearsed "happenings". Bead necklaces, shaggy mid-life-crisis hair, paunches, boot-cut jeans, casual racism and crap similes about tacky footballer's cars that cost more than most of us will earn in half a decade. I really don't know why I bothered. But then Clarkson made reference to the English football fans mocking the Americans over the Deepwater Horizon disaster and referred to their "You're not *swimming *any more" (see what they did there?) chant as "Brilliant!". Chortling away, he seemed to be revelling in the fact that not only had a dozen people died in presumably horrible agony, but that hundreds of thousands would lose their livelihoods and huge swathe of unique ecosystem has been potentially destroyed forever. Haha! But it's funny because they're AMERICANS, i.e. not us. In fact I got the distinct impresison that it was even more lol-worthy to him and his audience because this disaster had been inflicted by a British owned company. Ha!

I've tried to write it off as part of a constructed persona, pandering to a certain demographic or whatever, but fuck it... the biggest star at the BBC got the boot last year after mildy insulting one bewildered old man on some obscure podcast. Clarkson gets up on primetime terrestrial BBC and makes a gloating, xenophobic joke about an ongoing social, environmental and potential economic disaster and no-one bats a fucking eyelid?

I'm not ashamed to say i've just comlained to the BBC about it. For the first time too. Maybe i'm getting old or whatever, but I can't stand that that revolting, bigoted, hate-mongering CUNT is what passes for mainstream entertainment in this country.

This. Notice the all but hidden homophobia with the star in a reasonably priced car bit as well?

Jeremy Clarkson and Top Gear.

I couldn't sleep last night so in a bid to find something to watch I stupidly (i know i know) clicked a a new series of Top Gear. It was predictably shit from the get go; scripted "banter" and rehearsed "happenings". Bead necklaces, shaggy mid-life-crisis hair, paunches, boot-cut jeans, casual racism and crap similes about tacky footballer's cars that cost more than most of us will earn in half a decade. I really don't know why I bothered. But then Clarkson made reference to the English football fans mocking the Americans over the Deepwater Horizon disaster and referred to their "You're not *swimming *any more" (see what they did there?) chant as "Brilliant!". Chortling away, he seemed to be revelling in the fact that not only had a dozen people died in presumably horrible agony, but that hundreds of thousands would lose their livelihoods and huge swathe of unique ecosystem has been potentially destroyed forever. Haha! But it's funny because they're AMERICANS, i.e. not us. In fact I got the distinct impresison that it was even more lol-worthy to him and his audience because this disaster had been inflicted by a British owned company. Ha!

I've tried to write it off as part of a constructed persona, pandering to a certain demographic or whatever, but fuck it... the biggest star at the BBC got the boot last year after mildy insulting one bewildered old man on some obscure podcast. Clarkson gets up on primetime terrestrial BBC and makes a gloating, xenophobic joke about an ongoing social, environmental and potential economic disaster and no-one bats a fucking eyelid?

I'm not ashamed to say i've just comlained to the BBC about it. For the first time too. Maybe i'm getting old or whatever, but I can't stand that that revolting, bigoted, hate-mongering CUNT is what passes for mainstream entertainment in this country.

You Sir are my new hero!

I hate myspace.

looking at tattoo artists and they all have MS pages... why?

Where the fuck are the photos? While it is touching to read all the sweet comments ppl make. Sometimes you just want to see some fucking pictures.

Wimbledon.

people who sign off emails with "warm regards"

ewwwwwwww

Fuck them. Fuck them in their fucking asses.*

*over-zealous responses for comic effect may not be actual opinions.

hahaha!

gleee, they suck dick. this is sooooo badddd, cover of lily allen smile. please die!!

YouTube- Glee - Smile (Lily Allen Cover)

if mccarthy says anything i will stick a hot poker up his arse!

t mobile. such utter c*nts, i told them a month ago i wanted to cancel the contract and now they have no record of it so will try to charge for another month of line rental for a phone i havent even used!

Waiting in all fucking day for no fucking reason.

t mobile. such utter c*nts, i told them a month ago i wanted to cancel the contract and now they have no record of it so will try to charge for another month of line rental for a phone i havent even used!

I remember always having to tell t-mobile everything twice cause they forget to listen to your request the first time. It took them three months to restart a direct debit i'd never asked to cancel, while sending me loads of snotty letters about over-due bills during that time.

people who sign off emails with "warm regards"

ewwwwwwww

ALSO people who sign off with ' thanks in advance'
grrrrrr

Kraft 'singles', it aint cheese, its rendered oil or some shit, called 'analogue' cheese..
this knowledge came too late for me, i've eaten loads of them and have a irritable bowel syndrome.

gleee, they suck dick. this is sooooo badddd, cover of lily allen smile. please die!!

glee hates you too

own brand supermarket mobility carts......... if you really need one, the nhs will get you one. But if it is too much of a struggle to drag your flabby arse around the supermarket for half an hour, huffin and puffin as you go, then get an internet and do your pie and cake shopping on-line, then you can stay in your house until you are too fat to leave and then the fire brigade can come and remove your front window and winch you out to have gastric band fitted all for free. 'SImplz!' ( i hate the meerkat as well)