Crap 'Buzzwords'

"Podiumed" is vile.

Does anyone hear "what does success look like"?

I've heard it quite a lot recently. Is it used in a TV show or film or something?

"what does success look like"

usually used alongside the execrable 'key performance indicator'

well what the fuck else are supposed to do with cake?

PM me for pics

"Real estate" used in any context other than land/property.

I've just been sent a corporate rebranding doc with snackable in it, but I'll raise you "minfographic" (mini infographic) and "simplistrations".

I quite like the latter's potential as a term of abuse...

What does "line ball" mean?

It's where your trousers are too tight and you're squashed a bit.

Or it's where it's difficult to say whether something is one thing or another. Like a ball that's close to the line in tennis.

Thanks.

Presenting a document to a client today, my colleague said, 'we wanted to socialise this with you'. I know it's pretty common, and she apologised after, but she's still dead to me now.

I experienced "boil the ocean" in real life last night. Other than that, it was a pretty good talk. And the bar was free.

"there are no unicorns, but there are a few foxes"

I like that one. I'm going to start using it but with an entirely different meaning each time.

"i'll put some sprinkles on top"

As in "you can't polish a turd, but you can roll it in glitter"...

ObOlympics:-

Phelps is slowly morphing in Carlos Tevez

Ha!

Winningest is also an Americanism that sets my teeth on edge.

'dogfooding'

Whut?

Someone at my place keeps putting a "thought of the day" on our intranet. Today's was:
Replace the words “I have to” with “I choose to” and notice the difference in how you feel

Eating your own dog food, also called dogfooding, is a slang term used to reference a scenario in which a company uses its own product to test and promote the product.

I choose to take a shit....

Make sure you choose to wash your hands.