Overheard at the LFGSS golf club bar

They don't even keep time.

Expensive to replace the batteries

Need to employ a winder...

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Is that what my teachers were on about when talking about being a wind up merchant?

^^ came here to post this

I will park anywhere I like outside my drive to accommodate 4th car

they're all different [...] as someone who also owns at least seven divers

fish. barrel. bam.

Serves them right for not using quotation marks.

the wife works for a bank

We have 4 vacuums

Doesn't qualify for golf club unless they're mainly used by the cleaner.

they're mainly used by the cleaner

For ~25% more money I'd go for the PS2 every time

Dinner at The Wolseley last night. The food is simple but delicious and the dining room is just such a lovely place to be.

decided they want to use their birthday money to buy a watch

Is this tongue-in-cheek? The food is bang average and the place is full of day-trippers

The food [at The Wolseley] is bang average and the place is full of day-trippers

fair

this tongue-in-cheek

It was me. I stand by it.

I had a really good shit earlier this evening

You should be taking to a proper accountant

I'm assuming your wife doesn't drive

She has sizeable income

Just like @@mashton, I stand by my work, but not necessarily for very long.