The World's Fattest Man with no bike! aka - find hippy a new bike aka - Just get ( fill in blank )

There you go, @hippy . You deserve a dedicated thread ;-)

I've got a bike. I'm riding my Tarmac.

/thread

I've got a few 'buns in the oven' wrt to next year's options. I'm waiting to see what happens with them all. Trying to get options in line though.

Ex-world champion.

Ooof

I prefer 'former' but I will always be the 2014 World Champion.

Always.

https://www.livestrong.com/article/515282-bikes-for-obese-people/

It's not a real WC though is it?

It's a bit Chris Welham.

Any more than Sagan is road world champ when 99.99% of the population aren't allowed to race against him. But I didn't start the thread. My performance in the 2013 Nationals is my best race ever oh and that time I rode around you in Richmond Park...

Ooff.

that time I rode around you in Richmond Park...

Returning fire

I rode around you

I thought things orbited around hippy?

There's no evidence of that ride in Richmond Park.

There's no evidence of that ride in Richmond Park.

The Defence rests it's case

It's a bit Chris Welham.

Haha, ouch!

So

You know and I know.
That's enough for me.

The 2014 World Champion.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Gravity_assist

He still couldn't outsprint the fat drunk.

Be

Does it fit?

Hip Be

So, hippy wants a new MTB. He just said so. What should he get?

I don't know, your requirements are in another thread and I'm lazy.

Requirements:

Flat mount disc ready
Di2 ready
Takes big rubber
Beer
Pies

Sizing:

Aiming for around 565/395 stack/reach

Under consideration:

Kinesis 4S Disc was ~£600
Datum FS was ~£800 (now ~1500?)
2016 Synapse ~£1000
Pivot Vault was ~£1800
2016 Diverge £2350-£4000, bike, 12mm front/back
Focus Cayo Disc - 142x12mm thru axle - ?
Boardman Endurance SLR Disc - ?
Trek Domane 6.9 Disc - 56cm - £6000, bit short

"I'm not a frame material nazi - own and race steel, alu, carbon..."

No integrated seat masts

No integrated bar/stems

No long waiting times for custom