Fucking terrible gifts for cyclists

https://youtu.be/cBq0MA30xhY

Wife’s grandma giving it her best shot. Annoying thing with the pizza cutter and this, if you’d just got me a non-bike-shaped version I’d probably use it.

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Now that my dad has retired my parents (my step mum) have decided they're not going to buy stocking fillers any more, thankfully. So this year the only cycling related gift I got was Bicycle Diaries by David Byrne, which coincidentally I've already got! I did buy my dad a fancy razor though only to find out that he's now got a beard. Touche I guess.

Now that my dad has retired my parents (my step mum) have decided they're not going to buy stocking fillers any more

I think stockings ended when I was about 12. I assumed this was normal. Was I wrong?

Stockings stopped for me but was still getting this type of ‘filler’ present.

Best thing we did for stopping them was to set a gift budget.

I think people like buying these things to give you more to open on Christmas Day but when they only have £20 to spend they aren’t going to spend £5 or £10 of it on this kind of stuff.

My controversial opinion is that Christmas presents should just be for kids. For everyone else it is a waste of time and money.

We've done secret Santa in our family for the last few years. One present, usually decent, £40 limit.

My gf calls it a Soviet Christmas

Not always: you like something from Metro? Old whiskey. Unpack (reused paper). Lagavullin. Is that nice, they didn’t have any other.

I got the very same thing. As you say, trying their best.

Came with some reflective running straps and flashing belt thing which could of course also be used on the bike. Not completely useless but I doubt will ever be used.

Bottle of Lagavulin would be decent, but why not buy it oneself?

My sister suggested a £40 limit one year, then presented a list of things she wanted: visiting massage (£80), luxury scented candles (£120) etc etc

Fucking jokes.

I'm not really one to go for a scented candle so I'm probably a bit behind the current on trend scent sensations but £120 seems like a lot for candles. Like, way too much.

I think a decent policy is to buy the type of thing that the recipient already buys for themselves, but one notch nicer than they usually do.

£120? What were they scented with, unicorn jizz?

or log into their eBay and buy something off the watch list

Bonus if you can get into their PayPal too.

Yes.

EDIT: Aren't stocking gifts things like chocolate, small consumable gifts such as an orange. Just silly things.

Some famous actor and maried to a cold play persons mimsy.

I had been looking for this thread for a while as I was given one of these the other day by my other half. Really thought they knew better... (aware I might sound like an arse for saying that)

❄️

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Fucking terrible or actually true?

Be honest with yourself now, be 100% honest…!

It's both isn't it

Some slippers with a photo of some random on a sportive with a my-first filter? Sure, great, thanks.

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I've got a colleague who loves tea and MTB.
I want to get him a tacky coaster, any ideas?

https://www.etsy.com/uk/listing/1496475520/disc-brake-rotor-coaster-wooden-coasters was the first response for googling "MTB coaster"