What do you think about while cycling?

Amazed that this thread didn't already exist on here, I discovered BMMF had written this hilarious/tragic Tumblr post back in Jan 2013:

What Do You Think About While Cycling: [INDENT] "that looks nice", “I’m hungry", “look at that", “I’m thirsty", “not seen anything like that for a while", “I need to shift position", “it’s so quiet", “here comes a bend", “I’ve not seen a car for over half an hour", “mmm, banana flavour", “engage my glutes", “the trees have changed", “I’m going to write another book", “I’m hungry", “hello, other cyclist", “what will I eat when I get home", “I’ll go fast for a bit", “what the fuck is life about anyway", “I’m hungry and thirsty", “fuck off, cunt", “wow, look at that", “I love cycling", “I hate cycling", “something about the human condition".
[/INDENT]So, people aren't shy about sharing all manner of ideas and opinions on this forum but what about the random thoughts, creative brainwaves, jokes and/or bizarre conversations with all have with ourselves at times, as we cycle?

I want to hear about yours!

My ass.

I just get a 2-line snippet of some godawful pop song (whatever was last on capital or being played repetitively on tv) going round and round in my head. It's annoying.

Current track: Get lucky by daft punk

You bastard, now I've got Daft Punk rammed up my brain hole.

I wonder if I've turned the oven off. Checking repeatedly in my head.

"My knee hurts"

"Oh only another 9 hours riding to go today"

"Fuck off cunt, or I'll shove that fucking car up your arsehole and inside the cavity where a brain should be but isn't"

"ARGH! Fucking potholes!"

"Why does my arse always chaff on one side?"

^^^ you loves it!

"I wonder how many of these gels I have left"

"What was that clunk?"

"Keep going, this might win you a fiver"

"Can't wipe snot on new gloves, shit, now what?"

x100 to potholes, and then "I'm emailing X immediately about this! Pahhhhh! Fnuking useless....etc."

"Look here cunt, YOU'RE the one stepping out into traffic, how about you watch where you're fucking going!"

"Where the fuck am I?"

"Which way should I go today?"

Where am I?

Oh wait, that one happens all the time :-(

"Christ, only another 10 hours of this"

"Fucking Garmin"

"Fucking rain"

"Fucking potholes"

"Fucking BMWs"