Epic WTF

Sat in the lav with two cans of strong lager and a grab bag of crisps.

#rep

Actual LOL from me

Mercedes F1 team announce sponsorship from company who made the flammable boards on Grenfell tower. Not sure who thought that was a good idea…

https://www.theguardian.com/uk-news/2021/dec/02/grenfell-survivors-outraged-by-lewis-hamilton-car-sponsorship-deal?CMP=Share_iOSApp_Other

Spikes update.

https://twitter.com/allpartycycling/status/1466470629390102534

^
Vandals only attack the passenger side mirror!

Yeah right, what a cunt

WTaF!?

Cause spikes will deter people from smashing it clearly.

If only there were a way for the people responsible for knowingly endangering countless lives to pay for it.

passenger side mirror!

I didn't realise it was only on that side.

I cba to ask how everyone knew it was aimed at people on bikes, rather than just another mod scene aesthetic, like BOLD NUMBER PLATE CHARACTERS. My first thought was to stop people scratching your car in a car park.

Makes sense now.

They had to be dragged kicking and screaming away from the easy money of a group of companies who effectively marketed lung cancer as a lifestyle choice. Given that Ferrari still takes money from Phillip Morris under the guise of mission winnow I think its probably fair to say that they dont care where the money comes from as long as they can find companies to bankroll their sport.

I think its probably fair to say that they dont care where the money comes

Ask Eddie Jordan how his mate's software company (with a turnover of a couple of million pounds) was sponsoring his team for 12 million, despite not displaying a single logo on the car.

At a guess the logo was somewhere, like on a hat or somewhere where a camera will see it.

What are you on about?

There was no logo, the company only existed on paper, it was insurance fraud.

Didn't know about the fraud.

Got any more info?

It’s not generally known, but as almost everything done by an F1 team can be classed as R&D they get all the tax refunded as well. It’s a great wheeze.

The more successful the team, the more the sponsors have to pay the team. It's possible to insure against this, which Jordan's pal did.

After a successful season a claim was made. But a F1 fan at the underwriter couldn't recall seeing this sponsor having any advertising on the car.

This was confirmed and the claim denied. It was also noted that a company with a £2 million turnover couldn't sponsor a F1 team for £12 million.

At the time I recall the F1 correspondent of the Times making enquiries and believe he wrote it up: would have been in the early/mid-Nineties.

Apols for Mail link...

https://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-10270067/Man-seeks-medical-help-artillery-shell-lodged-rectum.html?ito=social-twitter_mailonline

Army bomb squad technicians were sent to a hospital after a man arrived in casualty with a WWII anti-tank shell lodged into his rectum.

Medics called for specialist support after the man presented in the Accident and Emergency unit of Gloucestershire Royal Hospital in Gloucester when he could not remove the 57mm shell.

The military collector claimed the armour-piercing munition was from his private arsenal. He told medics the 80-year-old explosive device became lodged after he tripped and fell awkwardly.

the 80-year-old explosive device became lodged after he tripped and fell awkwardly.

It was just a lucky coincidence that it was covered in a lubed condom.

Tough wank

Ha fell awkwardly while walking around in his munitions store completely naked.

Seems to happen a lot, my old boss is a nurse and she once had her bank manager come in with a beer bottle right up his arse and he couldn't remove it, also said he'd fallen on it #awkward. #ohreally

Very occasionally, and I'm sure this is really rare, somebody must actually genuinely fall and end up with something up their arse. I feel sorry for the 1 in 100,000 people turning up at hospital with that excuse who are disbelieved 😂

his private arsenal

I promise that if I ever accidentally fall on a dildo shaped item and it becomes lodged in my anus that I will tell the nurse that I was actually fucking myself with it.

Even things up a bit.

You're ok unless it has your name on it. Sadly grandad lived next door to Mrs Doodlebug.