This morning's commute and other commuting stories

pretty sure i felt my lockring shift after doing a sick skidz this morning. either that or i went over some road markings.

will i die?

Today was exactly that. Be safe everyone. I'm being all zen at the moment and biting my tongue when I see bad stuff. It's a new leaf.

Safety's number 1.

The roads were covered with invisible slidey death this morning.

Also, cars. Cars fucking everywhere. What's happened with the traffic the past couple of days; it's been bloody awful.

this is London my friend

I had that last night, after the football finished I had to cycle through Norwich city centre and I had a funny feeling, sure enough a black cab pulled out on me then flicked the right indicators on as I was on the offside, I braked and the driver went off without ever knowing I was there, then had a pull out at a t junction so I just stopped and sighed. But something felt funny, I knew there was something going to happen. Also had a bizarre road rage with a tourist bus, a frighteningly strange exchange of emails and a call from the police to say the report was noted but it won't go further.

My email:

Dear Sir
I would be grateful if you explained to the elderly grey- haired gentleman driving your liveried vehicle east-bound on Pottergate ten minutes ago today that ignoring a Give Way sign and driving towards a cyclist (me) on the wrong side of the road is extremely frightening and likely to kill someone. The Give Way sign is there for a reason, to keep people safe, there was no need for him to act like a boy-racer to save himself two seconds of time. This is one of the worst examples of reckless, stupid driving I've seen, that your employee does it in a vehicle emblazoned with your company details is astonishing.

The company response:

the cyclist was cycling on the wrong side of the road, in this country we cycle/drive on the left. I see hundreds of occasions every hour that cyclists do wrong, jump red /ignore lights cycle wrong way down one way street, cycle on footpaths, If you think you have power over motor vehicles to make them stop for you then i suggest you cease cycling and walk.Because you will end up dead. I see thousands of traffic offences every day in Norwich.there is virtually nil enforcement. I have a cctv camera in the windscreen of the charabanc which records at all times, it is needed in Norwich as cyclists are the worst road user in Norwich. Next comes motor cylcles, then cars, then vans. I have had 50 years: driving HGv 43 years, pcvs 15 years, 50 years cars, driven 4 million miles as far away as asia and as far as i know never hurt anyone. I used to cycle but not anymore i dont want to be seen asa cyclist in Norwich where they behave so badly.

Frederick Agombar- Sightseeing Tour of Olde Norwich.

Streetmap:

https://www.google.co.uk/maps/@52.6...!1e1!3m2!1sob8EV5eaFkCw2s5xCpdHRQ!2e0!6m1!1e1

He's got you there.

Sweaty ride in the rain for me, this morning. Had to cover the cast on my left arm to stop it getting wet.

^Bin bag arm warmers?

Tube for me this morning and a few days more, I suspect. Tweaked my back shifting topsoil for Mrs c00ps' raised beds.

wow. that reply is such a panoply of comically fuckwitted horseshit it should be be framed and put up in someone's toilet.

Frederick Agombar

Looks like he's a nasty fucker in any case

http://www.horseandhound.co.uk/news/carriage-driver-jailed-for-cruelty/

WAC. I'd love to help cause that chap some grief

who cares. the real issue here is when are one of you cunts going to buy me a pair of these??

http://www.horseandhound.co.uk/products/snakeskin-wellies-launched-talolo/

Surely name and shame on twitter and/or other public forums?

The officer said the driver disputed my version and claimed that the give way lines had been eroded by weather. The driver, apparently, went back to the junction this morning to double check:

It really doesn't look confusing to me. Even if the lines are hard to see it doesn't mean it's Drive a Charabanc Into a Cyclist Day.

Where's my pitchfork?

Greenhll is Jimmy Nail, AICMFP

I went back to take photos ten minutes ago to make sure I hadn't dreamed it.

Now who looks like a sad loser!

Charabanc

Worth setting the fucker on fire for this alone

was this by any chance the driver?

http://andrewburdett.co.uk/2012/05/05/st-lukes-norfolk-tour-day-one-5-may-2012/

he looks plenty trustworthy to me, i'm inclined to believe his version of events.

"We’re going to have a bit of trouble getting out of this little road, gi’z a minute.", he’d say.

lozzles

My complaint is not over our tour guide in his capacity as a tour guide – after all, he certainly knew his stuff. Yet I was concerned by the way in which he shared ‘his stuff’ with us. Banging on his goose-neck microphone to draw our attention, before turning around to face us (moving his mouth away from the microphone in doing so), and pointing sharply to examples of his various subjects as they pass on either side of the van – all whilst keeping his foot on the accelerator and with his eyes only occasionally on the road.

he sounds like an expert driver to me.

Conkers.

Had a skip lorry stop behind me at the lights by streatham station at about 11:20 then as I looked back he had turned his left indicator on so I took primary as I pulled away. Weirdly enough an identical skip lorry passed me 100 yards later or he had decided not to make a left. Skip lorry drivers are very safe and none of them are the sort of cock nuggets to plan ahead an unsafe overtake with the excuse "he undertook as I was turning" no not ever...

Frederick Agombar

Frederick Agombar abuses horses? What a cunt.