This morning's commute and other commuting stories

/satire

A complete knob (old guy wearing a beanie) riding a tandem pass oval.

I saw one other cyclist on my 12 mile commute across London, it's getting busy.

Oh sartorial mavens of the commute-o-thread!

Where do we stand on the jersey-jeans-propercyclingshoes combo?

Like the mullet, it says: "Yes I have a serious side, yes I put the miles in, but my legs also enjoy the music of Scouting for Girls and Embrace, so I have a fun side."

Essex people drive innit

Rode the Vespa today and a cyclist nearly took himself out by closely overtaking me on a corner and cutting in front. Once we were both upright I gave him a little toot of the horn. He went bonkers and started yelling at me to "BUY A BIKE. BUY A PEOPLE CARRIER." Then he shot through a ped crossing and nearly hit someone. The London commute, eh?

At what time? I go through there at 8.15 and its fine

Stopped a potential RLJ by tutting loudly. :-)

They RLJ'd the next set of red lights. Le sigh. In Club Kit. Le double sigh.

12 miles across London, entirely within London, at no time was I in Essex.

I went through at 8:20

Actually I remember this morning I was quite a bit earlier. Something to look forward to tomorrow then

Had some guy wheel suck from streatham to croydon then ask which way I was going to check if he could wheel suck some more. Total cunt, club kit didn't offer to get in front, probably topped all his stravas on my effort.

Last night, coming to the end of the Surrey Canal into Peckham, spied a bunch of little shits on bikes fucking about at the end of the bike lane, where it goes through the shared ped space. I slowed down accordingly.
Just as I was passing them, one rode across me and dropped his bike about 6ft in front of me, across the bike lane. Laughing, they all scarpered.
Either I'm getting paranoid in my old age, or they're deliberately trying to cause cyclists to have accidents.
Stay safe peoples.

Saw a fully grown man in a mapei jersey who, despite being a grown up, rode on the pavement and jumped lots of reds.

I saw this after the fire was extinguished. Looked a right wreck.

There have been some attempted bike-jackings at this spot. Can't remember where I read it, but it was on LFGSS.

not me, but my work colleague was called a faggot and then had a hot coffee thrown in his face by a black cabbie on that massive roundabout by Hyde Park Corner this morning.

Apparently was 5 mins after they had an argument after my mate slowed down when approaching the a red light rather than gunning it to it and having to slam brakes on.

Has different commute for next 2 weeks, involves Vauxhall, tries new cycle paths for first time this morning – HOW THE SHIT DO YOU GET FROM SOUTH LAMBETH ROAD TO ALBERT EMBANKMENT FFS! Confusing mess, ridiculously narrow cycle paths, pedestrians squeezed by cycle paths, still so much space given over to three-lane roads...

I hate when drivers do that, or just speed past you, cut you up, and come to a stop at the lights just for you to ride back past them and stop at the ASL in front...

If it makes any difference, I get beeped/shouted at when I trickle up to red lights in my car too! Where do these people think they are going to go?

I think that's kinda what he said to the cabbie but he proceeded to just say "well you look like a right faggot". Only to then throw the coffee in his face 5 minutes later?! Bizarre. Shame he didn't get his number plate.

Everyone else has got used to your schedule and adjusted theirs accordingly. That or found another route entirely.

Yeah, it's nuts, I tend to just turn left onto Parry St and follow the road around staying in the middle lane. All motorists been quite nice and left me plenty of space or stayed behind, but it'd be nice to not have to dice with death.

This and the 'showers full of part-timers' problem above can be fixed by waking earlier. Sun's out Gun's out or bikes out or something pithy...

I'm hoping he filed a report with the police - Having coffee thrown in your face sounds a lot like common assault or battery.