This morning's commute and other commuting stories

Oh, but this 'gotta be first' thing is actually the quintessence of British road culture.

Meditation On The A30 by Sir John Betjeman

A man on his own in a car
Is revenging himself on his wife;
He open the throttle and bubbles with dottle
And puffs at his pitiful life

She's losing her looks very fast,
She loses her temper all day;
That lorry won't let me get past,
This Mini is blocking my way.

"Why can't you step on it and shift her!
I can't go on crawling like this!
At breakfast she said that she wished I was dead-
Thank heavens we don't have to kiss.

"I'd like a nice blonde on my knee
And one who won't argue or nag.
Who dares to come hooting at me?
I only give way to a Jag.

"You're barmy or plastered, I'll pass you, you bastard-
I will overtake you. I will!"
As he clenches his pipe, his moment is ripe
And the corner's accepting its kill.

Made it up Highgate hill after fully expecting to have to stop and nearly vomit, like yesterday's ride in.
Hoorays for me. I wonder if I can keep it up.

Genius. Never come across that poem before.

Nice!! Thanks for that.

Bloody hell. When Gatorskins start to puncture, they really start to puncture don't they?

Excellent stuff.

@ffm would rep

If you find yourself behind someone when you reach a junction, why not stay there?

Well said.

Increasingly, I am now thinking quite carefully about when and when not to filter at lights at all - depends on how long the queue is really. If there's only on or two vehicles in front, why not take primary and wait like everybody else?

Sun! And no 40 mph headwind like yesterday.

Ah yeah, I see that too over in Belfast:
1 - You are in green box, somebody else goes right in front of you
(bonus: They go through red when it's green for peds while you patiently wait)
2 - On kerb, off kerb, again to use the ped light, but they don't dismount. I am waiting at the ASL...sigh...

And lots of kerb cycling, but roads here can be narrow and kerbs clear, I don't think you should do it, but well it doesn't perse cause inconvenience. But kerb cycling with a helmet on = toplel for me.

Aphex twin now lives in a village in Scotland or somewhere

I do this pretty frequently - the only downside I've encountered is a woman named Karen driving directly into the back of me. Not really an argument to the contrary but something to keep in mind...

Someone hasn't moved off immediately from the lights? Lean on the horn

As someone who has some traffic lights outside their house, this boils my piss.

Had a bus driver do this three times to me this morning, I was the only other person on the road, everytime the light went to amber they would hit the horn. The second time they did they I decided to ride very slowly in primary until we reach the bus stop.

i think for bus drivers it becomes a habit as so many cyclists put themselves beyond the point of being able to see when the lights do finally change to green. said cyclists are planks.

Every lorry seemed to decide that this was the morning to do a three point turn on a very busy road. Commercial Street, Bishopsgate and Southwark Street. Quite annoying.

I once thought that was happening to me. Turned out it was the squeak of a sticky air brake being released.

Simple reason is that during rush hour, waiting behind one or two cars is completely futile because no one else will. The slowest cyclists have to be at the front 'because it's safer' or something.

If you do wait behind a car it's best to do it in the gutter rather than primary, blocking the way forward as much as possible. You can almost feel the rage behind you. LoL.

I encountered the Bishopsgate lorry, the driver was a really decent guy actually, waited for lots of us to filter past before moving off

Today I are mostly giving priority to peds waiting on refuges or significantly far across the side road they're crossing...

Despite the professional deivers around me who don't.

"professional".

I do love this word.

Being paid to drive like a cunt.

Doing something way more than the average person so that you get far more complacent.

I struggle to believe there was only one.

If you do wait behind a car it's best to do it in the gutter rather than primary, blocking the way forward as much as possible. You can almost feel the rage behind you. LoL.

One of my favourite petty moves :)

Got drenched this morning. Put clothes on empty drying rack. Returned to drying rack twice to find wet kit piled on floor. Clothes still damp, having only had probably about 10 minutes of a 9 hour day to dry. There's no c*nt like an anonymous office c*nt.