Royalty

Or maybe a coiffure of Olivers

king clive the 1st
king oliver the 2nd
king derek the 1st

i know which one gets my vote

er, happy people

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about as pityful as the chumps that queue up for a phone.

Anyway, congratulations to the as yet unnamed now Royal. That kid has already, in his short life, attained all the qualifications that he will require for a long comfortable and affluent life. Pretty bloody impressive for one so young. Just goes to show that focus and hard work pay off.

Street party flyer came through the door yesterday.

Fuck that bunting flying sponge cake gazeebo noise.

bets are on Alexander apparently... very Romanov

Yep our road is having a street party with road closures and everything. My wife and kids are very excited. I'm in a position where it looks like I will have to be an adult, go and not ruin it for them and others.

I was hoping for Benny.

Prince Benny has a nice ring to it.

We're going for Liam in the office. Prince Liam

Still, would you swop places?

Not Armstrong apparently but that old nonce with the Head and Shoulders on the beach.

Or personal opinion on brexit expressed through the naming of a child.

https://www.theguardian.com/uk-news/2018/may/08/monarchy-is-corrupt-bring-down-house-of-windsor-royal-wedding

Charles to take Meghan up/down the aisle

https://www.theguardian.com/uk-news/2018/may/18/prince-charles-to-walk-meghan-markle-down-aisle

Euphemism?

Well, as long as Philip doesn't give her the traditional welcome to the family.

Actually, not sure he'd still be able..

So neither of their dads will be there.

Also: fuck these people. Sky high.

Hasn't he got a new hip that needs a road test?

I have celebrated the coming nuptuals by joining Labour For A Republic.

I mean I guess he'll just get a footman to fill in for him.. so to speak.

Poor daft Meg though. If they managed to drive Di insane imagine what they'll do to her.

Di married the heir to the throne. Meg is marrying the ‘spare’ who is now an uncle three times over and hence redundant.

Maybe, but Kate feels like she is part of the family in a way that Di never was. She certainly seems like she is several bricks closer to a full hod than poor Di ever was. Plus she's married to Wills who doesn't seem to have inherited the batshit crazy from his Dad.

All this makes the mixed race American 'star' a tempting target of opportunity for 'sport'.

So neither of their dads will be there.

I am LOLLING like an idiot in puplic. I thenk you.