Moderators (requests and notices)

Mwahaha.

I just worked out how to mark the whole of the forum read for another person.

Now, the next person who tricks me into marking forums read, will have a cron job created in their name which will mark the forum read every minute of every day.

I love database based sessions.

^is that the forum equivalent of a nuclear deterrent?

people will only go on to build bigger and more dangerous links to counter your threat as the arms race progresses on and on.

before long it'll be an automatic link that adds scoble to your friends list?... the humanity!

I get to win, I can re-write their posts as they're submitted to remove it.

It's a bit ex-PFC Wintergreen, just stopping all messages from one side of the equation.

Bans related to the ongoing cluster fuck of Friday will be handed out in increments corresponding to the fibonacci sequence.

That is, first ban is 1 day, next ban related to the incidence will also be 1 day, then the next is 2, the next is 3, and then they go up pretty fast: 1 1 2 3 5 8 13 21 34 55 89 144 233 377

Patience = zero. Bans = pocket full of them.

Day-Moe banned for 3 days, shit-stirring by name calling.

Next ban is 5 days.

I finally snapped on two people.

I'm banning dancing james for 6 months. It's a forced vacation from the forum while he sorts himself out.

Almost every major incident in the longest time he's either been a key person involved in, or has actually been the cause of. I don't know why he cannot stop shit-stirring. I don't know why he fights everything and respects very little of what the forum is about. His existence on the forum has become largely corrosive and poisonous. Enough is enough, it's been only a couple of weeks since he posted some 8,000+ tags that brought down the forum tag system (and I've still not fixed all of that), and despite literally hundreds of warnings over the years, and what amounts to all the forgiveness I could muster, my patience is through.

If he evades his ban with an alias, I will add 1 month to the end for every day that an alias has been in use. The ban is going to stand and will not be shortened. I will also not listen to pleas for his well-being and how he needs the forum or anything, if his existence on here is just to shit stir, then the forum does not need him.

He is of course not barred from attending forum events, going to drinks, or anything else. The ban only exists on the online forum. It only applies to this website. I expect him to continue to do that which he does offline, this isn't a ban from the community, just from the forum. So I am underlining the fact that this ban is different from a ban within the community, I cannot enforce that, and actually offline he's perfectly alright. He only seems to have this problem online.

I'm also banning greasy slag for 1 month.

This is in reaction to the post he made last night which was incredibly cruel, and was a surfacing of politics between himself and dancing james that dates back a few years. Greasy also knows better than to take part in such thing, but what made the post particularly cruel was that he aimed to rile james by attacking a proxy who has nothing to do with any of the original stuff that happened.

He also is smart enough to know not to bring that stuff online, yet he did so with full awareness of what he is doing.

I'm sure everyone will be up in arms. My personal view on these bans is that james's isn't long enough, and that greasy's is possibly too harsh a reaction on my part.

I don't condone what either party has done, but given some thought this seems a little unfair. But that's just my opinion.

raking the coals?

Not at all. I've just given things some thought.

Velocio is an arbitrary and whimsical God.

V's house, V's rules.

Fairness doesn't come into it...

(V)Al Murray.

Velocio is an arbitrary and whimsical God.

Velocio is an arbitrary and whimsical God.

they all are dear

they all are dear

He works for less than £5 per hour. I wouldn't call that dear.

But I bet he drinks £35 worth of coffee in the meantime.

He used to, but now can't afford it.

Who was the guy who invited everyone for a free coffee? Oh, Teenslain.

What, everyone? Like all 30k people?

List?

Who was the guy who invited everyone for a free coffee? Oh, Teenslain.

Never invited me. Bastard.

Nor me, it's OK though, I was washing my hair that day.

It never happened. His espresso thing burst or something.

Check the Festive 500 ranks for evidence of people with an aching well of loneliness in their empty unloved souls and a wish for something more meaningful than hundreds of dread hours grinding over withered blasted moors and drizzling dual carriageways for covert 'real cycling' exploits..

ftfy

[QUOTE=hippy;2636887]Check the Festive 500 ranks for evidence of people with an aching well of loneliness in their empty unloved souls and a wish for something more meaningful than hundreds of dread hours grinding over withered blasted moors and drzzling dual carriageways for covert 'real cycling' exploits..

ftfy[/QUOTE]

It's just a good job I wasn't drinking anything when I read this, as I can't justify a new keyboard on top of all the bike bits I'm currently buying...

You must spread rep before giving it to Luci again...

This forum is going all Oprah lately.

This.

where's my free car then?

We're giving away - shit. that is it. Shite.
Shit and headaches.