I've never 'got'

URmichaelowenAICMFP.

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Tuck one of these under her little silver bag saucer.

Then, unblinkingly, hold her gaze and ask her to put the bag in the compost caddy as you don't like old bags knocking around the kitchen.

Fucking hell. Amazing.

Not sure that is bring back rep worthy or you both scary and funny.

Gambling.

If you enjoy the turf it's unavoidable.

I mean the initial appeal is pretty understandable, minimal investment both financially and temporally for significant gains should you get lucky. But long term it can definitely get horrible very quickly. Playing any house casino game or fixed odd slot machines is just stupid. Odds based games that have an actual majority skill element is a different story though

Gambling

I recommend continuing not to get it.

Gambling

I used to bet on the spring classics. I started with a £5 bet, ended up with £400 by Liege Bastogne Liege. Bet365 (I think) would take each way bets on teams and the wolf Pack was in good form.

Apart from that I have only ever lost

Plenty guys I work with have terrible gambling addictions. Betting thousands. It crushes me to hear about.

Horse racing.

As a 'sport' which only exists to facilitate gambling.

Both existent sports, racing and pugilism, arose through gambling. The rest of what are now regarded as sports are codified Victorian games.

I play the lottery.

Never been to a bookies.

Worked with people that would take their last fiver down to paddy power at lunch

And to stop incredibly rich people from getting too bored.

Much like keirin

Ours go into the sink to cool

Get to fuck.

@nef

My family go to the races once or twice a year, no madness, little bets on 20-1 horses. That’s what I grew up with. That’s what I thought gambling was turning a couple of quid into £20.

I went to vegas with work and played blackjack a few times, I expected to lose $50 a night but in return I got free drinks and got to chat shit with some interesting weirdos that I wouldn’t normally meet, it seemed like a fair trade off.

Then I worked in an office with a lot of gamblers. Hundreds/thousands on favourites…absolutely insane, I don’t understand the will to crash your life.
There was some kind of weird macho vibe to it. A total lack of imagination and creativity…real men don’t paint pictures or ride bikes, they gamble.

One guy would bet his entire monthly pay packet on the FTSE100 whether it would close up or down. It got really intense as the market closed.

I used to be a sucker for substances, gambling is a once every few years distraction for me…I guess it hooks into some more than others

"Hun"
As an abbreviation to Honey. "U ok, Hun?"

Although prior to flouncing off FB a decade ago, I did see some post "hunny" as an elongation of "Hun" so maybe I am the fool.

I’ve circled the relevant parts here. They’re confused people, you are not a fool.

[pictures in the usual LFGSS reverse order]

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The thing with gambling is if you have the mindset (like I do) that you're more terrified to lose money than any buzz you get out of winning it then it's incomprehensible to see people lose a month's wages in an hour.

But it's fucked (like all addictions), I grew up on council estates surrounded by people who gambled, we were always skint as fuck and as soon as I started working I couldn't imagine spending anything before sorting bills, food etc but my older brother would get his pay packet and sink a hundred quid in a fruit machine without batting an eyelid.

The worst thing though, is after a 60 second buzz from winning they go straight back to betting it all again.

I wish! She knows I’m too tight to do that. I did once threaten to convert her guest bedroom into a kitchen and brick up the hallway to her end of the house though.

sink a hundred quid in a fruit machine

Fruit machines were my nemesis for a few years. As a kid I always liked the lights and the game element and there was always this mystery about how to play them. Then someone showed me how to play them. First time I played one on my own, the worst thing happened, I took the jackpot. £15 in those days so not exactly vegas.

Of course this made me think I was some sort of gambling genius but the house always wins over time. Learnt the hard way but stopped eventually. Once I got a proper job and started getting a half decent wage, I stopped looking for the quick win. Played one on holiday this year. First time in ages, after a couple of quid it spun me in £15 and took me straight into the feature. Old me would have been “hoho! It wants to pay out!” but I just took the money and I walked off.

I play the lottery.

Yep, got to be in it to win it. I do it by Direct Debit so I never get tempted into buying more or playing the instant win games. I do, however, recognise that I'm lucky that I've £50/mo of disposable income to do this.

Never been to a bookies.

Pretty much the same.

Although 15-20 years ago I made ~8%/week on the discrepancies between bookies odds on UK football betting. But then the bookies got better at providing similar odds, any chance of an outright arb disappeared, and the overround closed in.

8%/week sounds good but to maintain a reasonable income (say £1k/week) you'd need to be staking ~£12k/week and there's a risk that a set of bad results could see you lose it all in one go. I couldn't stomach risking that much so I don't think I ever staked more than £100 in a week with most individual bets being £5 or £10.

One benefit of being a Maths/CompSci nerd is that I was able to do a whole load of statisticaly modelling and worked out that the best way to make money out of it was (when the bookies had closed things down) to stop doing it and write a book about how it all works. I managed the first part easily but not the second (Joseph Buchdahl's books/guides were the ones I used along the way - I missed the opportunity to extend them and publish by own, but then it'd be a moral quandary for me to facilitate/promote other people to gamble).

The few times I've gone to Vegas I've just played $5 blackjack tables with friends or had a small punt on roulette, literally randomly picking red or black with a single bet and then walking away regardless of the outcome (I'm definitely up in this).

Fruit machines

Although I did used to earn ~£100/week playing the ones at the pub I worked in. This was in the days of the £4 cash jackpot or £8 token jackpot - early/mid 90s. The bar staff would let us know if there had been any big payouts in the evening (based on the number of tokens in the till), if it was a bit light then it was easy to take ~£30-£50 out of the machine(s). The bar manager would happily swap any tokens for cash.

I did also stick 9EUR in a fruit machine in Cannes because they wouldn't let us into the casino, 3EUR a spin, third spin gave me the 1500EUR jackpot. Merci.