"If you want to ride in the middle of the road pay road tax!"

I'm sure we've all heard that refrain shouted at us from motor vehicles

What is your favourite comeback to this pearl of road wit?

I send Oliver round to their house.

"I do."

"UTFS". no, hold on, that's not right.

"its called vehicle excise duty u retard!"

punch first, talk later.

"Yeah, Your Mum!"

The last time someone told Jaygee that he was in the middle of the road, the guy got off his car, walked to his boot, opened his boot. I seriously thought he was looking for a shotgun and that it would be really silly of him to shoot us and to get into so much trouble for 20 metres of road space. I was extremely calm knowing that I was seconds away of being shot. Anyway lucky us, he seemed to have left his shotgun in his garage, so closed the boot, walked back to his car and left. Oh and he also was on his mobile, when I remarked on it he went "SO WHAAAAATTTTT!".

"Ha..that all you got!"

"you will be"

i pull this out from my fakenger bag, and politely ask them to repeat

I usualy shout 'Its my fucking birthright get over it!'

^ I like that one.

i like comebacks with lots of profanity and manic screaming.

dancing james' tatic is to ride slowly in front of them with two fingers erected behind his back.

What is your favourite comeback to this pearl of road wit?

"Shut the fck up!! I hate you!"

"You're not my Dad"

I flash my blockbuster card and say "it's a good thing I'm off duty otherwise we'd be having a conversation at the station you cunt"

".......how about you shut that child cock sucking hole of yours before I take all your windows you fat cunt"

With this as a visul aid

Not only do I not pay road tax, I'm also a gay, dole scrounging, tree hugging, illegal asylum seeking, Queen hating, Liberal voting, Daily Mail hating, cross dressing, expenses filing, porn star. Also, my bike are brakless.

Not only do I not pay road tax, I'm also a gay, dole scrounging, tree hugging, illegal asylum seeking, Queen hating, Liberal voting, Daily Mail hating, cross dressing, expenses filing, porn star. Also, my bike are brakless.

The t-shirt competition is well closed...

"You're not my Dad"

for some bizarre reason, this response made me laugh out loud.

"A fool and his money are soon parted" is another favourite, as is beating people with my quick release chainring.