Epic win

Nope, you promised a quid.

i only shoplift.

/wins thread.

Or do what I did.

Call a promotions company and get them to send you a sample of their supermarket trolly keyring coin for free...

ftfy

And you promised to shut up, we're both in the wrong.

I bought one of these bad boys off a charity.

Opens 100% of supermarket trolleys and definitely a conversation starter kind of key ring.

Also, if they really insist on you using a £1 coin, will open the till as well, no waiting needed.

I carry a cat o' nine tails that I've adapted as a trolly dragging tool.
I tie nine baskets to the tails and then drag them around the supermarket, thus negating the need for a trolly and giving me an excellent workout, not mention being a marvellous conversation starter.

once you've paid the first pound, that trolley is yours for life.
why would you need another?

I bought one of these bad boys off a charity.

Was that from Screwfix, the celibacy reduction charity?

One of the Estates Maintenance guys was outside the office with a power washer cleaning the leaves and crap off the ground. When he got to the bike rack he gave everyone's bike a quick clean. Maybe not epic, but lots of win.

Some people would not be impressed if they just lubed...

Meh, if you're keeping it outside it's probably not all that valuable.

Barry from Watford calls Iain Lee about Blue Badge Holders - YouTube

It is a nice biscuit

Actually laughing out loud.

great, all the way to the very end

it's an actor!

It's a strange world out there. With minty biscuits by the sound of it

Really?!

@ greenhell

Very funny.

Listen to Barry From Watford's Wife Margaret . . I Sh*t You Not - YouTube

No, he said it's a Viscount

Ahhhhhh it's an actor :(

I want a minty biscuit!!

VAG KAV WHIP SLOW MOTION ACTION - YouTube

...and now it's MY turn, he says.