Football

Nice one, Villa...

Have you handed your login details over to @mikec ?

oh god. That is just too Shit.

Can't see us pulling this one out of the bag now. Villa >>>>>>>>>>>>>>

some high quality urination in the final nine already.

citeh, libpool and spurs i am looking at you.

but am i really the only one who thinks chelski still have the capacity to yellow fade the linen yet?

they really shouldn't. but look at them. they really might. charlie adam ffs.

there has always been something slightly retarded about mourinho teams. and that might just win out

We have won 70% of our 30 games thus far and need to win 62.5% of our remaining 8
matches.

So if we count draws as losses, which they are not, we should do it but it will be close, provided that Arsenal and ManU win all their remaining games, which they will not.

In terms of points, we have won 70 out of 90 available ie 77.778% of points available up to now. This would mean, if repeated over the remaining 8 matches, that we should win between 18 and 19 points from now on. Six wins or six wins and a draw or five wins and three draws.

We need five wins provided Arsenal and/or ManU win all their remaining matches.

If we ignore draws and only give points for a win, we have won 63 points out of 90 available so far. We need to win 15 of 24 remaining points which is 62.5% which is less than the 70% of points already gained from won matches.

^ Mourinho's next team talk

You have also taken 80% of the points available in the last 10 games (24/30) and 78% in the last 6 (14/18). So unless you are entering this final run by caning 2 pints with an already full bladder, turning on the waterfall soundtrack, getting into bed and dipping your little finger into a glass of warm water then you should be fine.

if Arsenal and Man U repeat their last 8 games form then the will finish on 81 and 79, Chelsea will need to then take 12 form the reaming 8 games (50%) to win the league.

We need five wins provided Arsenal and/or ManU win all their remaining matches.

Given that two of your games are Man Utd (h) and Arsenal (a) that means you can only afford to not win one other should those two win all of theirs (they can't since Man U v Arsenal is on the 17th).

Taking into account the remaining games (and not just the maximum points):-

Chelsea are guaranteed at least 7th at the moment. Arsenal 8th. Man U 9th. Citeh could still end up 10th. Lib, Spurs, 13th. Southampton 14th.

All teams down as far as Southampton could still end up 1st. Swansea can only get to 2nd.

(Currently writing code to anaylse league table and fixtures to work out if champions/promoted/play-off/europe/relegated places have been decided.)

don't forget, chelsea still have to play liverpool

(Currently writing code to anaylse league table and fixtures to work out if champions/promoted/play-off/europe/releg­ated places have been decided.)

Does it take into account the fact that Liverpool always finish the season stronger?

Clive, throwing in a percentage sign here or there won't make me want to give you a cuddle more than normal.

Chalfie, as I know that you always want to cuddle me, that is not a huge concern xxx

a hug concern ?

Zlatan

Nice kerning...

I see Wilshere is expected to return soon. He was spotted recently by a friend queuing outside a toilet late on a Thursday night in a central London hotel. He went on to ask if the friend if he was 'waiting for a line'. He seems fairly determined to squander his talent.

Nice to see Arsenal among the European elite.

Clubs with the most appearances in the European Cup/Champions League without actually winning it:

Dynamo Kyiv: 27 appearances (semi-final in 1977, 1987 and 1999)

Olympiakos: 26 appearances (quarter-final in 1999)

Anderlecht: 25 appearances (semi-final in 1982 and 1986)

Rangers: 23 appearances (semi-final in 1960 and 1993*)

Galatasaray: 21 appearances (semi-final 1989)

Panathinaikos: 20 appearances (final 1971)

Arsenal: 19 appearances (final 2006)

CSKA Sofia: 19 appearances (semi-final in 1967, 1974 and 1982)

Rosenburg: 18 appearances (quarter-final 1997)

Sparta Prague: 17 appearances (semi-final 1992)

Austria Vienna: 16 appearances (semi-final 1979)

Clive, I think you need a break again.

@cliveo, rather than cutting and pasting bits from the guardians very own knowledge, why not link to an article with a bit of merit.
Improving the quality of english coaches from the grass roots up.
http://www.theguardian.com/football/blog/2015/apr/08/football-coach-first-step-fa

thread ends

pot calling the kettle bl ...... um, i mean, thats a bit rich

He's just pissed cuz Cliveo got in first...

My irony meter seems broken beyond repair.