Snot Rocket

I've accidentally flobbed on myself whilst riding. Pretty embarrassing, all gloopy and hanging from my handlebars. Yeah, yeah, I meant to do that, innit.

I've also been spat on (accidentally a few times by other cyclists as I've overtaken them). The last time I was behind this fat chap who blew snot from both his nostrils, one after the other, but the winter-morning sun was so low in the sky that I saw the entire 'cloud of snot' - which I then rode through. It fell on me as a fine mist.

I had to wash myself with fire to feel clean again.

That pisses me off.
I am going to spinning bird kick the next fecker that spits drive-side, instead of the gutter.
Have a look first, you feltcher.

i coughed up a ball of phlem after my frist day as a messenger in DC, i was riding into the wind, the black mucus got me in nose, and splattered across my face, i had strings of it running from my upper lip when i got to a place to look in the mirror, it was perty epic.

i bet just-made-redundant-with-a-freshly-dead-bother-but-still-out-with-his-mistress-guy will rocket the next cyclist he sees.

Fixed.

This thread is making me feel sick to the stomach, mainly becuase I have a terrible cold at the moment and amsure my guts are filled with snot from sleeping on my back all night and this thread has just made me realise it... yuck.

I always get a bit grossed out in the showers at work in the mornings when all you can hear are people letting big bushmans go as soon as they get in the shower, might be time to invest in some thongs to keep my feet out of black London boogers on the cubile floors.

he did have a tangerine and was talking about his drive to oxford...

Lunch, anyone?

Steak tartare?

I got a ped who was about to step out into the road in front of me in the face with a snot rocket last night. I am proud of myself.

10 points

Doing a theatric snot-shot onto a vehicle that has recently tried to kill you is perhaps OK.
middle of the windscreen - 5 bonus points
door handle - 10 bonus points.
driver's window - 25 bonus points.

10 points

come on its worth more then a handle 50 at least!

Scott not snot.

at least he had a job!

I have a job, its not my fault it involves getting drunk with good looking people and seeing boobies.

Those who are without road sin shall fire the first snot rocket. Well done, chris for being judge, jury and executioner.

I don't think that it is a good idea to hand the treatment we get from motorists down to peds in a sorta bully pecking order.

Seriously people....fucking grow up eh!

Pardon! Growup™

A few years ago some schizophrenic guy in West Hampstead, where I used to live, gobbed on me one morning as I was walking in my office smarts down to the Tube, briefcase in hand - generally encumbered. Just that: gobbing, not saying anything, no threats, then walked on. My first thought was 'thank god there's a shop next to the Tube station where I can get some tissues to wipe this shit off'.

And people wonder why cyclists have a bad reputation?
I'd have been more proud of the fact that i'd been the bigger man and accepted that people will always do stupid things like stepping out into the road in front of traffic....if it makes you feel proud to empty the contents of your nose into someones face for doing something stupid then good for you...personally i find that fucking pathetic.
People step out in front of me all the time....i had a cabby trying to squash me the other day....but i was grown up enough to deal with it and carry on my way...safe in the knowledge that i didn't lower myself to his level.
Seriously people....fucking grow up eh!

not long ago there was a ruckas on here about another cyclist snot rocketing a cyclist on here.
Snot rocketing aint nice and is quite frankly disgusting...

not long ago there was a ruckas on here about another cyclist snot rocketing a cyclist on here.
Snot rocketing aint nice and is quite frankly disgusting...

Innit, just have a fat old sniff FFS

I got a ped who was about to step out into the road in front of me in the face with a snot rocket last night. I am proud of myself.

Charming as always Chris. Almost as much so as when you almost ran a load of pedestrians down on critical mass, shouting "i'm not getting out of your way so you'd better get the fuck out of mine" (when they were on a pelican crossing).

not long ago there was a ruckas on here about another cyclist snot rocketing a cyclist on here.
Snot rocketing aint nice and is quite frankly disgusting...

utterly disgusting, but also hilarious.

if i was walking and a cyclist fired a snot rocket at me, i'd chase the fucker and return the compliment. it's only fair.

(this thread is such a good blend of "fuck you, ped scum!" and righteous pacifistic indignation, i love it. well done to all)

Lfgss rises from the ashes- perfect mix of wrongness and right

@ BRM Patrick Swayze is ginger???

He's a closet 'ranga.

"There's hundreds of them sir, they're everywhere..."

I don't think "snot rockets" were even around until about fifteen years ago. I mean it was something people did in the swimming baths when they got water in their nose... but why is it necessary on the street? Don't get it at all. It's one of those small markers of the further decline of civilisation (or "sniffle-i-zation" - arrrrm) in the last decade, along with girls going for a slash in boys' toilets and Jeremys Clarkson and Kyle not having been given a good shoeing in a loosely-tied sack.

I don't think "snot rockets" were even around until about fifteen years ago.

You're mistaken, we used to do it on club runs in the 1970s, 'Italian handkerchief' was my favourite term for it...

club runs, yeah - but street? since when did people start doing it in the fuckin' street - cycling or otherwise?

anyway everyone knows the 70s were the start of the big problems for loads of stuff, your generation has a lot to be contritious about Platini..