Snot Rocket

I got a ped who was about to step out into the road in front of me in the face with a snot rocket last night. I am proud of myself.

Is that where you blow snot out your nose? That's quite impressive!

Is that where you blow snot out your nose? That's quite impressive!

yes.

I had two peds step out in front of me last night without looking. As I passed inches behind them at speed I shouted 'LOOK!' They jumped out of their dozy skins.

I got a ped who was about to step out into the road in front of me in the face with a snot rocket last night. I am proud of myself.

Brilliant! :D

Also known as a bushman's whistle

Hands up all those who've fired one off only for it to suffer a malfunction and end up as friendly fire.

It's "blue on blue" nowadays I think?

a gentleman would use a handkerchief.

then fling the contents at peds.

And people wonder why cyclists have a bad reputation?
I'd have been more proud of the fact that i'd been the bigger man and accepted that people will always do stupid things like stepping out into the road in front of traffic....if it makes you feel proud to empty the contents of your nose into someones face for doing something stupid then good for you...personally i find that fucking pathetic.
People step out in front of me all the time....i had a cabby trying to squash me the other day....but i was grown up enough to deal with it and carry on my way...safe in the knowledge that i didn't lower myself to his level.
Seriously people....fucking grow up eh!

...then fling the contents at peds.

Also known as a 'spiderman' (but you don't use snot).

And people wonder why cyclists have a bad reputation?
I'd have been more proud of the fact that i'd been the bigger man and accepted that people will always do stupid things like stepping out into the road in front of traffic....if it makes you feel proud to empty the contents of your nose into someones face for doing something stupid then good for you...personally i find that fucking pathetic.
People step out in front of me all the time....i had a cabby trying to squash me the other day....but i was grown up enough to deal with it and carry on my way...safe in the knowledge that i didn't lower myself to his level.
Seriously people....fucking grow up eh!

i guess i was trying to say that then got waylaid by the obvious punchline the image threw up.

And people wonder why cyclists have a bad reputation?
I'd have been more proud of the fact that i'd been the bigger man and accepted that people will always do stupid things like stepping out into the road in front of traffic....if it makes you feel proud to empty the contents of your nose into someones face for doing something stupid then good for you...personally i find that fucking pathetic.
People step out in front of me all the time....i had a cabby trying to squash me the other day....but i was grown up enough to deal with it and carry on my way...safe in the knowledge that i didn't lower myself to his level.
Seriously people....fucking grow up eh!

your right individual action will counter act something that has been ingrained in society by generation of mass media and stereotypes about wealth, and privilege. Also fun should be banned.

You don't know what the hell was going through this peds mind when he stepped out...for all you know he could have just been made redundant...he could have just got a phonecall saying a loved one had died....people do stupid things when they're not concentrating all the time.
He could have just not been paying attention too...but either way, unless he deliberately jumped out in front of you and tried to knock you off your bike he didn't deserve to be treated like that....you're a fully grown married man...not a kid in a playground.
You live in london where people will be stepping out all the time...cars will be cutting you off all the time...just deal with it like an adult.

As for your stupid 'banning fun' comment....if snotting on people that do stupid things is your idea of fun then you're more childish than i gave you credit for.
And the worse thing is that he didn't even step out....he was only 'about' to.

hmmm,

snorting gobs of phlegm into peoples faces.
fun.

looks like a new fetish for urban dictionary is waiting to be documented.

not one i fancy getting in on.....

i bet just-made-redundant-with-a-freshly-dead-bother-but-still-out-with-his-mistress-guy will look both ways before crossing the street next time.

So crhis... People have this aversion to attacking you.. can't think where this stems from....

Thats pretty fucking teenage man. i wouldn't be all that proud!

i wouldn't be all that proud!

you probably where not that drunk!

Ewwww. Chris, that's a bit wrong. He might catch your bad aids from you now.

i bet just-made-redundant-with-a-freshly-dead-bother-but-still-out-with-his-mistress-guy will look both ways before crossing the street next time.
at least he had a job!

Well seeing as we're being all childish today chris, i'm gonna join in the 'fun' as you call it...your grobags order just got cancelled! i'd feel fucking ashamed to see one of my bags on your back!

You don't know what the hell was going through this peds mind when he stepped out...for all you know he could have just been made redundant...he could have just got a phonecall saying a loved one had died....people do stupid things when they're not concentrating all the time.
He could have just not been paying attention too...but either way, unless he deliberately jumped out in front of you and tried to knock you off your bike he didn't deserve to be treated like that....you're a fully grown married man...not a kid in a playground.
You live in london where people will be stepping out all the time...cars will be cutting you off all the time...just deal with it like an adult.

As for your stupid 'banning fun' comment....if snotting on people that do stupid things is your idea of fun then you're more childish than i gave you credit for.
And the worse thing is that he didn't even step out....he was only 'about' to.

Excellent post!

Peace

Doing a theatric snot-shot onto a vehicle that has recently tried to kill you is perhaps OK.
middle of the windscreen - 5 bonus points
door handle - 10 bonus points.
driver's window - 25 bonus points.

Go, web, go.

I once spat at a peds feet, while stationary and not paying attention. The ped looked like she was going to have conniptions, whilst I died a little from the shame.

'conniptions' - approved.

I had catarrh once when I was about twelve and kerchooed a golf-ball gob of near solid phlegm onto the teacher's desk. She saw it before I had managed to find anything to get rid of it and she gagged a little bit.