I confess...

Maybe don't put everyone on your bike, and you'll go a bit faster. Maybe.

Bikes in Flowery Skirts, photos or it never happened.

I own a NoLogo as my only bike, I use it to commute and I can't afford anything decent.
However, I give approximately zero f*cks as I love riding.
And I still come on here and read about all your fancy bikes.

i can't work out if this is tragic or beautiful

Maybe don't put everyone on your bike, and you'll go a bit faster. Maybe.

Bikes in Flowery Skirts, photos or it never happened.

Not only do they wear flowery skirts; they smell incredible and look at me in a sex face.

That's not a sex face, my friend.

That's pity.

It's OK though. I've been making do with pity for quite few years now.

i can't work out if this is tragic or beautiful
It's both!

It's punk rock.

I am tempted to buy some speed.

Few from a newbie!

I'm taking a 22 year old out at work and I'm old enough to be her dad
I'm a massive design/font geek and I own Helvetica on DVD
I had an affair with a married woman
I should be working right now but I'm too busy on here
I'm also a beer geek, don't see the point in a normal pint when you can have something special (even if it is gonna cost you nearly a fiver, I work in Kensington don't you know)
I like brunettes over blondes, but the last two women I've slept with have been blondes
I wanna hurt someone I work with
I hate Piers Morgan, if he went under a bus, I think I'd laugh!
I used to spit in my old bosses tea a lot, he had small person syndrome and used to to full effect... I nearly wiped my cock round it once but thought that might be pushing it too far
Me and some of my mates but pubes in a burger once and watched while people we know ate it
I have an unhealthy obsession with anal sex (I'm not gay in anyway might I add)
I've never been arrested cause my dad would actually string me up
I hate people that take the piss out of me for being vegan but I don't say so cause
I'm too laid back
I really need to get some work done
I love ladies with good tattoos

Jesus Christ this has turned into a bit of an essay!

Vegan pubes I hope.

Way to introduce yourself there Johnny ;]

^delightful...

Do agree with this: I love ladies with good tattoos

Whilst tripping balls this weekend in Berlin I found an unlocked bicycle lent against a wall and rode away on it.

Four minutes adn less then a km later had a tearful crisis of conscience and returned it to the place from which I took it, having fixed their brakes.

snottyotter, it was way before I was vegan and the burger was from McD's so it probably tasted like shite anyway, and Wrongcog, cheers, best get it all off my chest!!
There's more but I haven't got the time or the inclination.

jakebrown... they're few and far between but that makes it better in the long run, especially chest pieces

I like bad tattoos on otherwise attractive ladies.
The lingering mistakes of youth are hot.

I like the cut of your jib, Johnnyw.

Thanks for accepting me into your fold lads... I can see me trolling around here quite a bit in the near future... I'll let you know how it goes with the 22 year old as well if you're curious!

Not normally fascinated by the love lifes of forum members, but tips for the curious please.

Don't get me wrong, I'm no Don Juan or anything, more of a drunken casanova of the Essex variety

I dont care much for Bradley Wiggins or indeed his chances of winning the tour this year. If he does win it will be through his TT ability which is fine but it lacks a certain joie de vivre. I hope Cadel Evans or better still Nibali knocks it right into him in the mountains and steals the jersey with a hatful of minutes to play with.

I find the Mod thing a little tiresome too.

I find both him and Cavendish nauseating, and what is the deal with Mark Cavendish? Everytime he's interviewed its like he needs to spit like he's got a big greener in his throat, rips my knitting out, that.

Anyway, deeply unpatriotic but no love for them both.

^ "Mod thing"? Whats that?

^his style. less so now he's had a haircut

I dont care much for Bradley Wiggins or indeed his chances of winning the tour this year. If he does win it will be through his TT ability which is fine but it lacks a certain joie de vivre. I hope Cadel Evans or better still Nibali knocks it right into him in the mountains and steals the jersey with a hatful of minutes to play with.

i want wiggins to win but would like someone like nibali to take a chunk of time off him in one of the early mountain stages so that Sky collectively have to make sure Wiggins gets the drop on him one day. would be a shame if wiggins can just mark his rivals and the GC contenders hold onto each other every day in the mountains

I do confess...

I pick my scabs and eat them. I have eczema so there are a lot.

I lie to taxi drivers, creating a whole new identity and life each time.

Every time I see

I make a little joke to myself and think "Haha I'm going to sneak through with my quill stem."

Welcome to my world.