I hate

I'm not sure thats as much of a problem as you think it is, given that the majority of modern cars apply the wheel brakes when you are stationary anyway.

I was taught (many years ago[1], shortly after they removed the need for someone walking in front of you waving a red hankie) that if stopped in traffic you should always have the handbrake applied in case you were rear-ended by some dopey twat. If you didn't have your brakes or you'd be likely knocked forward much harder into the car in front. If everyone didn't have any brakes applied then the domino effect would continue quite far up the line of cars.

Riding the brake pedal was considered bad as it wasn't as strong as the handbrake and when being smashed into from behind the brake pressure would be reduced (as the car lurches forward before your foot catches up with it).

Modern cars that auto apply brakes when stationary would obviate this a bit.

1. Checks license: 1993. Gah.
   

always have the handbrake applied in case you were rear-ended by some dopey twat

This is why I do it.

and for the sick wheelspins

And, for similar reasons, to leave enough space in front of you that you can see the rear wheels of the vehicle in front. Saves you getting front-ended by someone rolling back into you, plus gives them a bit of wiggle room if they need to reverse for some reason.

That seems to have dropped out of favour.

Most people seem to be looking at their phones anyway whilst stopped in traffic. Twats.

Most people's attitudes when they're in their car seems to be 'fuck everyone else in the face'. I've had to do the school/nursery run in the car recently and I hate it. So many awful people in cars everywhere, seemingly just itching to get into a confrontational situation.

Not to mention faster cornering on selective application of said brake

And after riding the clutch inching forwards and backwards for ages they are always the slowest to get going when the lights change. Go figure.

If the car is an automatic then you do sit on the brake, then press the go pedal to go again.

if stopped in traffic you should always have the handbrake applied in case you were rear-ended by some dopey twat

Precisely what I said to my driving instructor when he explained about just sitting there with no brakes. Aparrently it's not a concern. Somehow.

These fuckers

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Jees! Packaging altogether: milk cartons, pull lid food cans, bacon trays, those stoopid sticky tapes on loaves of bread. It's a wonder there aren't hundreds of arthritic pensioners dying of starvation in houses full of impenetrable food.

I have a top tip for anybody with packaging woes.

Move to Switzerland. I have never bought anything in a supermarket there that doesn't open perfectly exactly how it is intended.

INCLUDING PACKETS OF MINCE!

When I were a student I worked at Saino’s and they opted for tight fitting lids with no additional top underneath. This was following focus group studies that said they didn’t like the additional top you have so rightly objected to. Problem was they couldn’t get the lids on securely enough every time so people ended up with soggy bottoms in their shopping bags or in the boot of their cars, people really did kick up a fuss about spilt milk. Eventually they copied Tesco who opted for an additional seal all along and your eternal hatred was secured.

tl;dr? Without that lid the incident of carton leakage on your way home from the shops was too high.

bacon trays

Yes but the worst ones aren't those that open, but not easily. The worst ones are the ones that pretend to have a tab that you can pull, but actually even if you manage to get a hold of it, the package is fully sealed on that corner too and it doesn't make any difference, you just have to cut it anyway.

Exactly what I was getting at. Perhaps the pensioners will croak of a stress-related heart attack before they starve?

Preferably before the 12th Dec.

Robbie Williams.

Robbie Williams.

Yes yes yes. So much this. He's the captain of the council of c**ts. And heads up my holy trinity of hate with Tess Daily and Lenny Henry. Honourable mention to Ellie Goulding pushing hard for a place in the top 3.

I should clarify that politicians are exempt, not because they're not worthy, but because no one else would get a look in.

On that note, "oven ready" boils my piss.

Writing the above has been quite therapeutic. I think on reflection the thing I hate is untalented people being idolised and given repeated opportunities to stink up the TV/radio. Probably why I dislike Paddy McGuinness too. To hate them is probably a bit strong but I certainly dislike them. Except Robbie, I hate him.

people who describe a loud/annoying noise by replicating the loud/annoying noise

Walking the dogs by the stream reading this and crashing through clouds of mosquitoes. It's winter ffs.

People complaining about dazzling car lights, I bit the bullet recently and got some yellow tinted glasses for driving, glorious, sure I look like a poor mans Hunter S Thompson but I shrug off night time driving and rain with fresh eyes now, lovely, recommend

Entitled parents who think it's ok to park in disabled bays because pushchair.

Hadn’t thought of that. Grand idea

Angels is the best song of the 20th century and I will wrestle anybody who disagrees.