"Oh Shit" moments...

^
Bet he doesn't even pay pavement tax either...

I've seen a shocking amount of drivers ignoring people on pedestrian crossings recently, and have nearly been ran over a couple time myself while crossing side roads. At least on a bike I've got lights, peds don't have anything.

Did you see the Eight out of ten cats episode with Tynchy Strider (SP?) on it?

He made a big point of "I don't have to stop for zebra crossings- I choose to stop so peds should thank me", which I thought at the time captured the current attitude to these things- people are so selfish these days that they consider mandatory road regulations to be a matter of choice if they impact on their journey.

If it was TS he was probably pushing the car.

Great Louis CK sketch on driving attitudes. Not sure where to post this, so repost away. 46m43s time:
http://youtu.be/6TWZI66KRl4?t=46m43s

Not sure if this should go here or in awkward moments.

I was teaching a bunch of 7 year olds from a posh school in Victoria how to fence this morning. As I demonstrated the lunge in my chinos they ripped across my inner thigh. No one noticed because the teacher had opened the door that exact moment masking the distinct ripping noise. I then proceed to teach the rest of the lesson with my legs clinched tightly together. I had to sit down till my escape route was clear so I can swiftly get to my bike and escape.

Even on the cycle back no one noticed. The bloody saddle rubs against my inner thigh wearing down the chinos. Must never wear chinos when cycling then demonstrate a lunge.

^Pervert

If fencing's your game, you shouldn't bother with the posh school in Victoria. Try the comp down in Pimlico, a lot of natural talent there, they got me top dollar for a load of TVs and car stereos I'd "acquired" .

broke into a school, stabbed some kids then took my trousers off

ftfy

^^ how do you think I get the money to fund less well off kids to get into the sport.

Also, keep your pants on (pun intended), my crb check just got re done... somehow I've passed again.

Car clipped me as they were trying to overtake me on a roundabout. Thankfully they hit my pannier bag and the rear of my bike just drifted a little. Caught up with the driver, his excuse was (no apology given) "I was concentrating and it was difficult" his passenger chimed in with "I did try to warn him!" I surprisingly replied with a string of expletives.

my crb check just got re done... somehow I've passed again.

reported

When I heard the loud plastic BANG behind me and all of a sudden instead of seeing road I was seeing the sky. Then came the "Aw shite!" in my mind, quickly follow by a very silent thud on the tarmac (in swiss condition), another 3 or 4 smaller thuds and then a swooooshhhh in conjunction with screeching tyres. Last sounds before the calm where of me shouting in pain and then taking in deep breaths and calm myself down while i check for any nerve damage.

I nearly got run over by a left turning HGV as a pedestrian last night. Fucking scary.

A huge Royal Mail lorry wae indicating to turn left at a crossroads. I noted that it was going to turn and stepped back a full ten feet from the kerb just in case it mounted the pavement.

It did. The rear wheels came further than ten feet over the kerb and in a matter of seconds I had to find an escape route as there was a fence behind me. The driver had no idea that I was there.

If there was an elderly person or somebody not paying attention there instead of me it would have been curtains. Shat me right up.

I'm going to give them a call in a bit. I don't think there is a way for a lorry that size to turn safely on that junction. I was watching the maneuver and the driver used all the space available to him...and obviously quite a lot more.

It is seriously scary how quickly a turning lorry can encroach on you. It has certainly given me a new perspective on how quickly you can end up on the wheels of one if you are in the wrong place.

Yes, please report it. That might also be something that the local authority/police could do something about. It's not the most elegant solution, but a bell bollard usually does the trick.

I nearly got run over by a left turning HGV as a pedestrian last night. Fucking scary.

A huge Royal Mail lorry wae indicating to turn left at a crossroads. I noted that it was going to turn and stepped back a full ten feet from the kerb just in case it mounted the pavement.

It did. The rear wheels came further than ten feet over the kerb and in a matter of seconds I had to find an escape route as there was a fence behind me. The driver had no idea that I was there.

If there was an elderly person or somebody not paying attention there instead of me it would have been curtains. Shat me right up.

What an idiot. Good you're OK.

You're not allowed to mount the kerb FOR ANY reason to begin with, (bar getting into a driveway) he/she should know that from driving test, then to not even look properly.

I get most of my OMGWTF moments while driving, anybody else have that experience?

Nearly got wiped out Thursday by a **** doing a D shape around me (overtake and back in) at 40 miles in a 30 zone. I checked my mirror, nobody there, indicated, then moved out and voila! Surprise!

Got a really close pass going down St Johns Hill close to Clapham Junction last night, from a big new beemer. Caught up with him and proved that I was spooked by not being very eloquent, himself and his female passenger looked guilty and shocked. Took a long time for me to calm down, I really felt like he'd not given a fuck and was just showing off. WAC.

Had a close call on bow flyover, cnut in a zafira overtook literally mm's from me even tho there was plenty of space to move whilst he Overtook. Caught him at the lights, banged on his window and told him he almost knocked me off, his reply of "oh i'm sorry man" wasn't sincere enough to stop me hurly every profanity i've learned in my 18 years of existence in his ugly face.

Felt good to vent, but in hindsight it was ridiculous how close he was.

Overtaking christmas shopping rush hour traffic yesterday evening, there was a big enough gap for me to slot between an on coming bus and traffic in my lane. Car driver even politely moved over a bit for me, I'm going at a fair pace probably 20/25mph ish. As I'm passing the bus some old dude is running across the road looking in the opposite direction, I shouted at him to stop but he didn't and so ran straight into me. We bashed heads and he hit the deck so hard after denting the car door with his head, second oh shit moment when he started spazzing out on the floor. I think he was in shock and disorientated by it, he got up and seemed ok but took him off the road as he was an old boy. Stayed with him for a while talking at the road side, he found it hilarious. Asked if my bike/me was ok and then apologised admitting it was his fault and then walked off. It didn't help the hangover I was trying to cure by riding!

Great fun reading these.

Riding on a cycle lane about 25 mph (dangerous, usually I'm in the middle/right of the car lane), car turns without indicating into a petrol station a little ahead. Had I been in the car lane I could have just gone round on the right.

Smashed into his wing mirror which broke into 100 pieces with my headset, peddle scrapped the car. Didn't put my feet down. Cycled in front of him, looked at the driver and passenger who although it was their fault had a look in their eye as if they wanted to stab/shoot me (was in a very very rough area, this was actually the 'oh shit' moment). So I carried on cycling while sticking my fingers up and took the first alley I saw.

Overtaking christmas shopping rush hour traffic yesterday evening, there was a big enough gap for me to slot between an on coming bus and traffic in my lane.

Hmm....

It sounds worse than it was, the roads in southampton are quite wide.

Had a few.
Front wheel stuck in tram rail three times. Once it made me frontflip and land on my feet, once the wheel popped out but my bike somehow changed the course and sent me on opposite lane, almost hit a taxi.
Third time I ate proper shit, messed my knee up.

Also once I was cycling home at night and reminded myself to check if my tail light is on. Was it because of wind, amount of substances that could affect my bike handling skills that I used earlier that night - I don't know but my bike drifted to the side, hit a kerb, got me rolling over cobbled parking spot.

There was also this time, when I was carrying trispok strapped to my bag, inside of which I had few beers. Hit a parking barrier with my handlebars and fell down. Fortunately spok and beers came intact.

This year there was some cycling picnic, I tried riding a tandem with my girlfriend. It was fun until she took the front seat (pilot?). Handling a tandem requires quite a effort and stopping it is harder than her normal road biek so she rode into bunch of kids (not on full speed hovewer enough to bruise one of them).

Some guy in Tesco Tooley st just sent 3 full shelves of glass bottles smashing to the ground. I believe his words as he took his bottle we're "oh shit", although he did manage to keep the bottle intact.

^ Booze or condiment?

If it's booze you should be drinking off the floor with a straw right now.