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@Thoma
I crashed on the sofa at a house party of a friend of a friend. I was the first to wake and headed upstairs to use the facilities. On the third stair sat, what must have been a perfectly curled, Mr Whippy of a turd except for the footprint in it. And subsequently on every other stair, a shitty footprint. In the bathroom, a pair of discarded be-fouled socks.
Later a pair of shitty jeans were found in the kitchen which led to the deduction that it was one of the housemates who was responsible for the muck spreading endeavour. He decided it was best to go and get a six pack before embarking upon the cleaning mission. Quite the charmer.