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@Balki
This thread is like that girl from high school that you had a little fling with but it never went anywhere and you've been holding a candle for her for 20 something years, and out if the blue she gets back in touch and says she wants to catch up and your heart's a flutter and you have a haircut and then you catch up and it's just no good and she's nothing like that figment of your imagination that you've created over time and you wonder why you couldn't get on with your life and why you've wasted so many years and had so many half-arsed relationships which left a trail of broken hearts, each one of theirs taking with it a piece of yours until there is nothing left and then you get so drunk you shit your pants.