• Wiganwill Has been taken ill in the last few hours. He was run over by a van filled with vitriol and bitter sarcasm.

    He is leaking bile all over the place and his spleen is over-enlarged.

    Nurses say he has a nasty taste in his mouth and his spine is out of line, but they can confirm he has been bitter and twisted for a long, long time.

    I'll pass on news as I find it...

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