Bike Anti-Porn - When Things Go Wrong

The streets will be full of giant pedalling cunts!
Fuck you, David Koepp!
Fuck you, John Kamps!
and fuck you too, Joseph Gordon-shitting-Levitt!
Due to your desire to be involved in a fast paced action movie, you've most likely unwittingly filled our streets with platoons of fixiebiek wielding tits, who'll hold a vague, yet ridiculously futile interest in cycling, until all their friends point out that longboards are cooler. And they'll ride like acid-dropping messengers, but with no experience and not a single fucking clue.

Uh, the streets are full of wankers who think they're messengers. It was like that in 2009.