Hiplok: A new hipster lock

Jesus Fucking Christ.

hes back!
save us, save us

shit! hide the porn

hes back!
save us, save us

You're fucked, you've been on the list for years.

Son, I'm disappoint!

Product safety lawsuits,
demented relatives with guns,
Jesus Christ.

My uncle tried to reach for a gun he had in the glove compartment of his car,
ended up losing track of the steering wheel, pulled his hand too fast holding the gun and shoot his own hand.
The other hand. The bullet hit the wedding ring and chopped his finger off.
True story.

My dad's mate was securing a ladder to the top of a van when, without checking, the guy in the van started to drive of. His caught his wedding ring on one of the rungs of the ladder and it pulled his finger clean off! No-one got sued, though.

True Story bro.

my yakuza friend managed to deeply shame both himself and his family but when his yakuza boss went to cut off his fingers the knife caught on his wedding ring and deflected the blade saving all of his fingers. so they shot him.

In 1912 my grandfather was working on a fishing boat just off Newfoundland when he bent over to pick up a haddock and the dim moonlight reflected off his wedding ring, through his Captains telescope and was magnified. At that precise moment the lookout on the passing liner 'Titanic' was blinded as he caught the flash in his binoculars and was unable to see for a full 4 seconds. 1517 people perished in the icy water.
Years later my grandfathers ring finger was bruised when he caught it in a kitchen drawer.

I think we can all agree that based upon the evidence presented in this thread that beyonce was in fact quite incorrect.

if you like it then you most definitely should NOT put a ring on it.

When I flipped over the handlebars while wearing a Panerai Luminar watch I broke my wrist because of the impact. It was the chunky watch which made it.
I also dislocated my other wrist when wearing a bangle. I found it completely straightened up on the floor. The ball of the bangle earlier embedded itself into the corner of my right ulna.

I just looked at this thread, been ignoring it for days cos I assumed it was just silliness... But no! There actually is a real so-called 'product' called 'hiplock'. 'bikesnob' is gonna 'have' a field 'day'. Autospell wants 'hiplock' to actually be 'hillock'. Which is nice. I like a nice hillock.

i used to work with a girl who's surname was 'hillock'. she had a habit of going on holiday and skinnydipping whilst drunk and having her mates take pics of her, didnt baulk at the idea of showing said pix around class either. lovely girl she was.

Autospell wants 'hiplock' to actually be 'hillock'. Which is nice. I like a nice hillock.

My inner-autospell want to see more hipcock.

Im gonna get one, have been looking for an extra lock to back up my mini-d.

If you are worried about falling off and hurting yourself then dont get it or just dont wear a lock.

Might let you know what i think of it if anyone cares ?

Good. I'm curious to hear what you say about it.

Can I ask why you are buying this, instead of a chain or rope lock? Despite my earlier comments, this is a genuine question. I'd be curious to know why choose this over something else.

Can I ask why you are buying this, instead of a chain or rope lock? Despite my earlier comments, this is a genuine question.

But seriously, why chain or "rope lock" would be a better choice?

@ hugo

Because i dont trust rope locks, i dont think they offer much resistance. This may or may not be true but psychologically i dont think they do.

All the chains i have seen are too small for my waist and im not keen on having to physically lock something to my self.

With all that said i could wear a normal chain around my neck/ shoulder/ back but my bag wont allow it. Maybe i could just put it in my bag? Jeez, i dont know, maybe i just like the idea?

Cool.

Like I said I was just asking.

My last sentence wasnt meant to sound arsey either :)

...so I'm in the market for a chain lock to back up my Kryptonite New York D lock and had a look / try on of one of these in Tokyo Fixed today.

Good, comfy lock, bit worried that it's a bit too hipster but think it's perfect for taking down to the pub when you don't want to bring a bag and aren't wearing a belt (I love pies). But just not sure how much protection one of these things give against Hackney's finest.

Anyone got experience? Would love to see a stress test on one.

+1 on the stress test. I think it will be an okay lock. hurry up bikeradar and rate/review the fucking thing.

I have no stress wearing one on the ride to the pub.