Annoying customers

FFS.. Rememeber that video clip? "we ordered 3 starters but only ate one"

*Hi

Hope you had a nice weekend. Dan brought the lights back to xxxxxxx this morning. Not sure if there is anything you can do about this but we didn't use the Arri light kit at all?

Thanks

x*

What can I do? Fucking charge you for the lights you cunt.

Do you not just have a stock response for these numpties? I have a series of draft emails that I alter for different uses.

"the amount charged covers the time that the equipment was out of our stock as per the agreement entered into at the time of order. This is not subject to whether the equipment was used or not. Dick"

Or something.....

my response was this
*Hi xxxxx,

We'll collect the lights.

Not much we can do about you not using the Arri kit. They were prepped, delivered and couldn't be used on another job.... So... well.. I guess you understand.. ;-)

M*

Nice winky usage there Brave.

What's happened to 'well, is it' who started this thread?

Day after day after day... Cunt wants a full HD camera kit..

*It's for a charity (Maggie's) and I'm not getting paid for the shoot so please feel free to charge me a lovely rate! *....

He gets the same response as they all do. While you may afford to work for charity we, as a business, cannot..

What's happened to 'well, is it' who started this thread?

anyone?

FFS. Annoying clueless hipster client... Below is the request and my exact response.

*Alreet...
I’m having a birthday silent disco at my house on 25th Sept and I’d reeeeally like some mood lighting/disco lighting for my living room. I know very little about TV lighting, so my questions to you are this:

Do you have anything suitable?
Would you let me hire from you for personal use?
What would the cost be?

I’d probably stick the lights on top of my kitchen cupboards so breakage is highly unlikely. And if you can help out, you might be entitled to an invite (you lucky thing)...

A what??
Anyway
· No. Sorry. TV kind of lighting only (I.E. big dirty hot bright lights)
· See above.
· See above.
I won’t feel bad about not being invited..*

^ Ha! WTF is a silent disco?

Apparently it's a gathering of total cunts: [ame]http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Silent_disco[/ame]

What's the world coming to?

What's happened to 'well, is it' who started this thread?

Banned for having the shittest username on the forum and not using question marks.

Being me the customer I need to get this off my chest, hoping that the cunt on the other side of the phone can actually read this.
So... ebay shop, I got something off them a few days ago, like 11 days to be precise. The shop is in Buxton, Derbyshire. I give them a ring this morning and try to explain to whoever answered the phone, That I purchased some grips 11 days ago and haven't got any info about if it has been posted yet. The immediate reply comes in a way of 'lecture' about how to track down a parcel, to which I reply I can't trace anything if don't even know if it has been posted.... resuming something long, he starts raising his voice, I raise mine, he calls me rude, I call him twat, he says he's about to hang up, I said he's a cunt with piss poor feedback. I still don't know where my parcel is. ´
Am I annoying? No, he's a cunt.

he starts raising his voice, I raise mine, he calls me rude, I call him twat, he says he's about to hang up, I said he's a cunt

you're bang out of order there....

like 11 days to be precise.

Oxymoron.

Plus you called him a cunt. I'd hang up on you.

Maybe..., got a bit infuriated by having what was supposed to be 'customer service' not being helpful, at all, his tone of voice was beyond acceptable.
I'm not a rude person, far from it, worked with people all my life, it's not my typical approach to anything. I just can't stand to be messed about with.
Bottom line is that I still have no idea about my parcel...

Oxymoron.

Plus you called him a cunt. I'd hang up on you.

Oxymoron no. When your ebay shop has in bold letters: " all items dispatched within 1 day", and it takes you 7 or 8 to post something, there's no info available, you get contacted by one of your customers and still you feel like you should lecture him/her about how to track down a parcel, and you don't answer to any questions!? Instead you decide to go through the route of: "I'm hanging up on you mate, you're being rude...", when in fact, I was the one being shouted at...? I don't think so... Calling him a cnut came way after the all shebang fell apart, and being talked to in a undecent way. The fact is that I had to call 3 shops including this one and this only happened with this guy. Everyone else was impeccable.

Call him again and play the Tourrette's card.

Don't forget to send him an email afterwards with this pic btw.

I did think of calling back... it was the kind of conversation where you hang up not knowing exactly what just happened, and why it did. I just froze on the phone..

Not annoying, more stupid. Well not actually stupid, just plain weird. Doing a shop re-fit or summat in Currys on the Old Kent Road and we're at it till about 3 am. Just as we're leaving a car hares up and out gets a large family, kids and all, carrying bulging bin liners trying to push past us to get in. I'm the gaffer so give it some large and they soon wind their necks in and just as I'm about to harangue them for taking children out robbing at that time I clock the bags are all full of clothes. Not a word of english between them so they just kept pointing at the store and showing me their smalls. Sod this I think so I'm in the car and off. Then as I look back to see what they're doing I see the storefront still illuminated (Lights on timer afert exit) and 3 massive signs "TV DVD" LAPTOPS DIGITAL CAMERAS" "LAUNDRY"
Currys Old Kent Road. London's only 13000 sq ft 24 hour Laundromat.

^ Ha! WTF is a silent disco?

Apparently it's a gathering of total cunts: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Silent_disco

I occasionally help out at a nightclub a friend of mine runs. During one silent disco there was a pretty drunk guy who had somehow forgotten that he, and everyone else, was wearing headphones. He was trying to order but kept shouting 'MATE I CAN'T HEAR YOU' at me so I flipped off his headphones and shouted 'TAKE YOUR HEADPHONES OFF THEN' in his ear. Then he realised that the club was pretty quiet and mumbled an apology.

Being me the customer I need to get this off my chest, hoping that the cunt on the other side of the phone can actually read this.
So... ebay shop, I got something off them a few days ago, like 11 days to be precise. The shop is in Buxton, Derbyshire.

I quite like Buxton - it's near my parents' place.

You can go and drink the water (warmed from being inside the earth) from a lion's head in the centre of town.

Forum ride anyone? It's about 180 miles if you go via Coventry. Takes most of the day.

Nuknow, what you said was an oxymoron.

"like 11 days" - means approximately 11 days
Then you said "to be precise"

No wonder the poor lad was on the back foot, you confused him from the outset! You should he ashamed.

I am disturbed by this morning's event, been having this uncomfortable feeling all day.

Nuno, how are you feeling today? Have you got over the traumatic experience yet ;)

More importantly, has the package arrived

cunt