Fucking right I am. Plastic? Real ducklings are cheap enough. Buy one, carry it everywhere in your new bag and let people marvel at how cute it is and how adorable the little peep noises it makes are. Then when it grows a bit and the quacking gets too much let it have free reign of a local pond. After its first winter, when its got a nice layer of fat around the breast area, butcher it and enjoy the utterly delicious taste of free range duck.
Geoff, are you actually able to think about anything except your next meat fix?
Geoff, are you actually able to think about anything except your next meat fix?