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@Matt
Cheers DJ and Steff. I called the Met when I got into work, but they sounded deeply bored and told me to go to my local police station to file a report... Will do, though, if only for the statistics.
Will take a dose of cyclecraft this evening, if only to quieten the 'well, perhaps you should just stick to the gutter for an easy life, rather than claiming your space' voice.