Help! Money & Wheel Stolen by Russel Thamer

sopariva. i think, i really want to hear the plan. *sniggers

OK so:

1. Get your messenger bag (As big as you have- Grobags are Ideal for this task)
   
2. Cycle to Princess Diana, offer her the small paperclip.
   
3. In reply she will offer you Prince Harry, but barter a bit and you'll get at least Prince William and probably a octopus minus a tentacle.
   
4. Put Harry and William into the bag, and sew the tentacle back onto the Octopus using the piece of string.
   
5. Saddle the Octopus onto the donkey, contact Mohammed Al Fayed and buy Fulham FC (again bartering will get you that shitty supermarket of his).As an Arab myself I can safely say that Octopus Donkeys are a very valued symbol of wealth and status.
   
6. Get the Thai to stand on the Swede's shoulders, and put a long coat on them (taken from that shitty supermarkets Big and Tall section) so that they look like one very tall man.
   7.Using the fact that the princes have diplomatic immunity, divide the two of them into quarters, and feed one eighth of the quarters to the organic Haddock, and one 20th of the eighth to the Thai/ Swede hybrid
   
7. Having now given a certain percentage of diplomatic immunity to the Thai/Swede Hybrid and the Haddock (organic) get the Swede to Smoke the Haddock in a traditional fashion.
   
8. Feed the forumer in question the haddock, and whilst he struggles to deal with the flavors, instruct your Thai/ Swede hybrid to smack him over the head with the bridget riley.
   
9. Take back what is yours and enjoy your role as the head of a shitty supermarket, chairman of Fulham FC, and liberally consume the remainder of the Princes before their best before date of 20/12/2012. Set the Thai/Swede free from your command to live in Denmark, and relax.