Spotted...

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i was walking west to get a sausage roll from greggs, your honour, when I noticed a suspicious looking gentleman on a push-bicycle. I thought his behaviour odd your worship because he was looking at my shoes. In thirty years pounding the beat your Grace I have never had any one, not even a hardened lag, look at my shoes in that way, your Imperial Majesty. That is why I decided to rugby tackle the miscreant and why, your Eminence, we are all in this court today. I rest my case, your Duke and Duchess, and may God have mercy on your soul

am i off the mark?

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