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they would be if you chain smoked cigars though (credit card required to keep up stock as cigars can be expensive)

Worth noting that a cigar would also burn through very quickly when riding due to wind resistance so keeping the holder stocked up would be a full time and expensive (credit card again) job.

Where do you put your lighter and cigar end cutter off thing though?

Perhaps that's on the next iteration? flick a hidden switch and a little flame pops up from the stem bolt hole... I imagine the cigar cutter could easily be incorporated into the end of the drops.

I assume the saddle is covered with quilted velvet?